15,000 Bottles Of Jameson Stolen In Best Heist Ever
I won’t lie, I’ve been the asshole who’s stolen beer from parties. I’m not proud of it, but to be fair, their parties sucked and my friends and I were thirsty. I imagine the same rationale was behind the recent heist of a Dublin warehouse in which 15,000 bottles of Jameson were stolen by some really ballsy thieves.
Their method was simple: they walked in, tied up the employees at gunpoint, proceeded to load cases of Jameson, Bombay Sapphire, and Jack Daniel’s onto TWO semi trucks, and then drove the fuck away. I’m not normally a fan of felony thefts, but I have to admit that I really enjoy the brass these guys showed. Not only did they stick up a warehouse, which is probably staffed by burly Irishmen just as angry and down for a fight as the thieves are, but they then spent what had to have been an eternity loading thousands of cases onto two separate trucks. I have so many questions. Did they have a forklift? Did they just do a fire brigade line to the truck? Do they own these trucks? Was Brad Pitt’s character from “Snatch” involved? Are they aware of how hilarious it is for them to pull this off, given that the whole of Ireland is stereotyped for being full of whiskey-drunk criminals?
Apparently it’s expected that they’ll try to sell all the liquor off during the holiday season, but why bother? Sure, you can probably get a couple bucks for each bottle and risk getting caught, or you can give them all away to the people of Dublin and then never have to worry about being caught for any future crime. Seriously, if they just gave it all away, they’d become the whiskey Robin Hoods of Ireland, which is exactly the type of Robin Hood you’d expect Ireland to have. Also, if any of the guys who pulled this off are reading this, I wouldn’t say no to an international package showing up at my door containing a little contraband..
[via Fox News]
Image via Instagram
Talk about a frelony (frat felony)
11 years ago at 3:45 pmYour parents made an enormous mistake in your conception
11 years ago at 4:38 pmWho do you know here?
11 years ago at 5:13 pmCan’t you read? He knows Dorn, his son… And I guess brother… However that works out.
11 years ago at 9:41 amBushmills over Jameson, and might want to check where that pale Irishman Bacon was during all this.
11 years ago at 3:46 pmGuess I’ll keep my Irish whiskey preferences to myself, chicken fuckers.
11 years ago at 3:57 pmwoah man, no one is fucking chickens over here. that’s downright un-human
11 years ago at 4:12 pmTwo semi trucks of whiskey would mean never getting a boner again.
11 years ago at 3:46 pmIrish have evolved over centuries of downing booze, hence no whiskey dick. How do you think we have so many kids?
11 years ago at 7:43 pm
11 years ago at 3:47 pmUgh haven’t they seen the commercial where they kill the big ass bird for stealing a few barrels…..
11 years ago at 3:48 pmRobin Hood: stealing from the rich and giving to the poor. NF.
11 years ago at 5:14 pmIs this another game of protester or drunk?
11 years ago at 6:42 pmGuy Ritchie heist > Danny Ocean heist
11 years ago at 8:56 pmSterling, give me your address and a package will arrive in a couple weeks completely not filled with dog shit, and totally containing a bottle of Jameson.
11 years ago at 11:09 pmRobin Hood stole from the government and gave to the taxpayers
11 years ago at 8:31 amWrong comment buddy.
11 years ago at 9:40 amYou fucks stole the forums from us which was the worst heist in history
11 years ago at 8:13 pm