2013 Wife Mock Draft: Second Edition

TheChampionsTour12 years ago

Lilly Becker

School: University of Arkansas
Hometown: Irving, Texas
House: Top-tier (formerly)
Major: Undecided
GPA: 2.1
Hair color: Brunette
Height: 5′ 6″
Weight: 165 lbs.

Pros:

– Father owns eight different Whataburgers across Texas.
– Decent at baking.
– Used to be hot.

Cons:

– Put on a good 30 pounds in the last two years.
– Kicked out of her sorority after failing to meet house minimum GPA.
– Has always cried a lot.
– Blames her weight gain on anxiety over being deactivated, but she had already started putting on weight in the year before.
– Will not be graduating, but is dropping out to “find her a man.” Good luck with that.
– Usually doesn’t get out of bed until well past 2pm.
– Multiple arrests.

Projected: Undrafted

Outlook: Tragic story here. Becker was a budding sorority star in her first year and a half in college. Above average body, cute face. Then she just took a nosedive. Started putting on weight, became annoying and petty, and things took a turn for the worse. Went from a 3.0 student to academic probation after posting a 0.4 GPA and getting arrested thrice in her second semester sophomore year. This all led to her getting her tossed from her house. Now, she’s a shell of what she used to be. Maybe if she hits the gym and gets her shit together she could be a decent enough option down the road. For now, stay away.