2013 Wife Mock Draft: Second Edition

TheChampionsTour12 years ago

Denise Hinkle

School: Bowling Green
Hometown: Louisville, Kentucky
House: Middle-tier
Major: Public Relations
GPA: 2.9
Hair color: Dark, dark brown.
Height: 5′ 4″
Weight: 140 lbs.

Pros:

– Just the sweetest girl there is.
– Not a great body, but there’s enough there to work with.
– Boobs are really, really solid.
– World class chef. Has her own steak rub that is sold in three local grocery stores.
– Her mom owned Mom’s Weekend.
– House was bottom-tier when she was bid, but she ran a surgical rush week her junior year and bid one of the hottest pledge classes on campus, elevating her once bottom-tier sorority to middle-tier status.

Cons:

– Crazy and not in a good way.
– Can be a spiteful bitch.
– Her friends are cute enough, but her best friend Brenda tips the scales at a hefty two bills and is the sloppiest drunk in three states.
– Wants to be married within six months of graduation.
– Dated three separate bottom-tier guys.

Projected: Mid-to-late 3rd round

Outlook: She is a fun, fun girl. There’s a lot of potential here. However, there are as many concerns here as there are positives. Brenda, the 200-lb grossout best friend, raises serious doubt that this would be a worthwhile relationship. Brenda is the most annoying girl at BGSU and just a horrible human being. If Hinkle can shed the whale, her stock will skyrocket as May approaches. Her expectations are unrealistic and will have to be tempered to suit the world everyone else lives in. Outside of that, she’s an outstanding sleeper candidate.

Note: All photos used are from the TFM photos section and not representative of the fictional characters listed.