2014 Wife Mock Draft

Kristi Grant

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School: Oregon State
Hometown: Billings, Montana
House: Top-tier Hotties
Major: Advertising
GPA: 3.6
Hair color: Blonde
Height: 5’7
Weight: 120 lbs.

Pros:
– It’s hard to stand out in a conference that produces such elite talent on a year-to-year basis, but Grant is far and away the most rock solid prospect to come out of the PAC-12 since Sara Jean Underwood.
– Set to receive an inheritance upon graduation. Early estimates have it north of $5 million dollars. Her plans are to reinvest it in real estate and watch the residual income roll in.
– Only had one boyfriend ever and they broke up a long time ago, so she’s over it.
– The only stripperobics instructor at the rec center who isn’t a stripper.

Cons:
– Has pubic hair, but from what we’ve been told, it’s something awesome no one’s ever even heard of.

Projected: Top 5

Outlook: This is a no brainer for anyone on the lookout. She’s a star. A bright, shining star.

Note: All photos used are from the TFM photos section and not representative of the fictional characters listed.

  1. aa1245

    This is wrong because everyone knows that Bacon is going to pick me in the first round.

    11 years ago at 5:43 pm
  2. OMFratRebel

    This is the worst mock draft so far. You should go ahead and do a mock draft of witness protection members with blacked out faces. That’s about as much as we’re seeing from these girls.

    11 years ago at 6:00 pm
  3. Natty Enthusiast

    it might be hard to look past the fact that king is a gdi, but its even harder to look past that ass

    11 years ago at 6:09 pm
    1. You’re retarded, in a matter of fact the Wife Mock Draft is probably the best thing that happened to this website.

      11 years ago at 7:15 pm
      1. Costa Vision

        Stay at home mother is a job in my book. An important one too. It is hard to start a political dynasty without a good conservative, Catholic wife raising my future US Senators.

        11 years ago at 1:09 pm
  4. Douglas MacArthur

    Fun fact, the hair loss gene is mostly inherited from the mother, so your dad’s head gives little indication on the future of your mane. If your uncles or great uncles on your mom’s side are bald, then you should be worried.

    11 years ago at 6:32 pm