2014 Wife Mock Draft
Nina Brown
School: Wake Forest
Hometown: Greensboro, North Carolina
House: Middle-tier
Major: Communications
GPA: 3.0
Hair color: Redhead
Height: 5’2
Weight: 130 lbs.
Pros:
– This girl is coming off of a great year. Really decided to kick things up and bring her A-game in her senior year in the gym.
– Traditionally good looking. Comes from great stock. Mom is a looker and dad has a tremendous quaff of hair that will likely be bestowed upon her future male children.
– Her bucket list is impressive: Super Bowl, bender in Amsterdam, Kentucky Derby, to name a few.
– Never cheated on a boyfriend. Not so much as even a kiss on another dude’s cheek.
Cons:
– Woman can’t bake worth shit.
– She has a mean streak, and not in a good way. Sentenced to court ordered therapy for repeated shoplifting offenses.
– May have trouble adapting to the next level. Has been called “the drunk girl” at three consecutive weddings. Not going to be easy to shake that reputation.
Projected: Anywhere from late 1st to mid-3rd round
Outlook: We’re having trouble putting our finger on where Brown is going to land. She comes from good stock and has the potential to be one helluva wife. There might be some growing pains, but if enough suitors pass on her, she will definitely be worth the risk.
This is wrong because everyone knows that Bacon is going to pick me in the first round.
11 years ago at 5:43 pmThis is the worst mock draft so far. You should go ahead and do a mock draft of witness protection members with blacked out faces. That’s about as much as we’re seeing from these girls.
11 years ago at 6:00 pmit might be hard to look past the fact that king is a gdi, but its even harder to look past that ass
11 years ago at 6:09 pmI just don’t see how that picture gets used on a 3rd rounder.
11 years ago at 6:45 pmThe real owner of that ass is a charter boat captain down here in SWFL.
11 years ago at 7:32 pmCon for #2: Your back will look like you had sex with a tiger.
11 years ago at 6:10 pmNina brown is most definitely a lesbian
11 years ago at 6:12 pmThis mock draft sucks ass
11 years ago at 6:27 pmYou’re retarded, in a matter of fact the Wife Mock Draft is probably the best thing that happened to this website.
11 years ago at 7:15 pmWhy does it list their GPA’s. Who gives a shit?
11 years ago at 6:30 pmIts not like they are gonna work if they marry us anyhow, right?
11 years ago at 7:12 pmStay at home mother is a job in my book. An important one too. It is hard to start a political dynasty without a good conservative, Catholic wife raising my future US Senators.
11 years ago at 1:09 pmFun fact, the hair loss gene is mostly inherited from the mother, so your dad’s head gives little indication on the future of your mane. If your uncles or great uncles on your mom’s side are bald, then you should be worried.
11 years ago at 6:32 pmMy God this is amazing
11 years ago at 7:06 pmThese are funny every time
11 years ago at 7:08 pm