The Only 2016 Presidential Debate Drinking Game You Need

Dan Regester8 years ago

Drink whenever:

• Trump backs his claims with “People are saying.”
• Anytime Trump tries to connect with African American voters by doing a sassy “Oh no you didn’t” hand gesture.
• Hillary tries to connect with the youth of America with a year-old pop culture reference.
• Hillary talks about how she has a vagina.
• Trump alludes to his dick and/or balls.
• Trump sarcastically compliments Hillary’s pantsuit.
• Trump interrupts Hillary with an insult or “to get his point across” by insulting her.
• Hillary attempts to interrupt Trump but gets strong armed by a “Can I finish?”
• Trump says the words “great,” “tremendous,” “huge,” or “beautiful” multiple times in the same breath.
• Trump cartoonishly shrugs or appears to be having an orgasm on stage.
• Hillary looks dizzy deflecting statements about her emails or Benghazi.
• Either candidate reassures the public that they’re in perfectly good health.
• Trump’s past donations to Hillary are acknowledged and then discredited seconds later by Trump.
• Hillary’s honesty is in question.
• Chelsea, Ivanka, or Melania are dragged through the mud.
• Trump drops a “People love me” or remarks about the ratings.
• Trump goes with his noted speech crutches “If I’m elected president, we will win again,” or “Make America great again,” and Hillary responds with, “America is already great.”
• Hillary appears to be contemplating having Donald Trump murdered.
• Mike Pence or Tim Kaine are mentioned and you find yourself asking, “Wait, who the fuck are they?”
• Trump sounds like your drunk uncle at Thanksgiving dinner.
• Hillary short circuits and forgets her “how to be a normal human being” programming.

Finish your drink whenever:

• Bill’s sexual indiscretions get brought into the mix.
• Trump backs up an argument with legitimate, specific facts and not broad political overtones.
• Hillary actually lands a joke.
• Trump reassures people he’s a true Republican.
• Moderator Lester Holt isn’t ignored when he wants to move on.

Butt chug if:

• Hillary dabs.
• Trump gets attacked or assassinated.
• Hillary starts convulsing on stage and has to be shocked back to life.
• You feel genuinely good about where American politics currently stand..

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