21 Signs She Needs The D

Coconut Oil Sex Gone Terribly Wrong

Every girl needs some D in her life. And like any other straight guy, I LOVE giving girls the D. Sometimes you’re hanging out with a smoking hot chick. A certified dime who you REALLY wanna give some D to. But you can’t figure out if she needs the D or not. Well I’ve created a comprehensive guide. Before you give a sexy lady the D, make sure she needs the D. Here are 21 telling signs.

  1. When she tweets about Donald Trump but accidentally spells it “Onald Trump.”
  2. When her favorite Kanye song is “Gold Igger.”
  3. When she says she hates Monays.
  4. When she liked it better when Jon Stewart was the host of The Aily Show.
  5. When she lives in Detroit but she calls it “Etroit.”
  6. When her favorite 2010-era Eminem song is “Not Afrai.”
  7. When she texts you saying you’re dumb but she says “you’re umb.”
  8. When her favorite comedians are Ane Cook, Aniel Tosh and Aam Sanler.
  9. when her favorite superhero is Aredevil.
  10. When her favorite Canadian recording artist is Celine Ion.
  11. When she says she loves her mom and ad.
  12. When her favorite horror movie is “Awn Of The Ead.”
  13. When her favorite rapper is Rake.
  14. When her favorite Eddie Murphy film is “Addy Ay Care.”
  15. When her favorite Phil Collins song is “In Too Eep.”
  16. When her favorite film is “The Ark Knight.”
  17. When she buys all her music igitially.
  18. When she parties, she listens to ubstep.
  19. When she’s sad because her Granma just ied.
  20. When she’s an Emocrat and thinks Republicans are estroying America.
  21. When she says she’s stuying to become an Octor.
  1. Chadwick Brice

    Wally, you exhibit all of these attributes, yet something tells me you have enough dicks lined up in front of your face to last you a fucking eternity

    9 years ago at 11:01 am
  2. The Human Power Move

    I just audibly murmered “oh my God….” to myself reading this in public..

    9 years ago at 11:36 am
  3. Lord Frattenstein

    Wally, did you honestly expect this joke to last beyond the first use? What the fuck is wrong with you that you thought this would be a good article?

    9 years ago at 11:36 am
  4. Hotrod

    Even your overly supportive grandmother couldn’t find a way to compliment this piece of shit article.

    9 years ago at 11:48 am
  5. Yoo Im Dickered

    Do you not run these by others before pressing “Publish” to see if they beat the shit out of you for making such horrible jokes? God damn man this was a trainwreck.

    9 years ago at 12:05 pm