25 Annoying Things Drunk Girls Do
We all know and love the promiscuity of drunk girls, but they can be a double-edged sword. Here are 25 annoying things drunk girls do on the reg:
1. Talk about how much they’ve had to drink, often exaggerating wildly.
2. Talk about how much they’re capable of drinking, and then throw up on your shoes.
3. Expect free booze, and then complain when it isn’t Grey Goose mixed with 18 ounces of cranberry juice.
4. Become even shittier at beer pong, which they weren’t any good at to begin with.
5. If they somehow succeed, even in the smallest way, during a drinking game, everyone within a mile radius hears the celebration that follows.
6. Their voices go up 2 octaves and 50 decibels.
7. Talk about non-brothers that you don’t give two shits about.
8. Change the music to their favorite song, which is probably Taylor Swift or Miley Cyrus and makes you want to commit suicide.
9. Lose their valuables in the house, and later, insist they were stolen.
10. Ask to keep their stuff in your locked room, and later, when they can’t get in because you’re busy with another girl, bitch because they can’t get their stuff.
11. Strip on the dance floor, but feel uncomfortable in the unisex bathroom.
12. Say “I never throw up” while insisting on being part of a shotgun circle, right before projectile vomiting on your chest.
13. Refuse to vomit in an actual trashcan or a toilet.
14. Talk about how much fun other parties were to try and impress you.
15. Attempt to dance on something precarious, and injure themselves.
16. Spill at least one drink.
17. Have at least one drink spilled on them.
18. Tell you all about how much they hate that inconsiderate bitch who spilled a drink on them.
19. Try to make food in the house kitchen, make a giant mess, and the end result will not be edible.
20. Insist their communications, art history, elementary education, or women’s studies classes are difficult.
21. Try to get special treatment despite not knowing a single brother.
22. Take shitloads of pictures, even though you’re on social probation and repeatedly asked that they refrain from doing so.
23. Post every single one of those damning pictures on Facebook with an incredibly unoriginal album title.
24. Roam in packs, and the ugly one in the group will cock block you from the hot one that was finally drunk enough to fuck you.
25. Bite the shit out of your lip during a makeout, because they think it’s sexy.
Second.
12 years ago at 3:31 pmtake a lap pledge
12 years ago at 12:17 pm26. talk about how perfect their little is
12 years ago at 3:34 pmand then they get mad when we fuck there littles^
12 years ago at 12:15 pmHoly Christ on a crutch, this was so bad I thought SFPL wrote it
12 years ago at 3:34 pmIt is a list after all
12 years ago at 9:23 pm26. Inspire shitty TFM columns
12 years ago at 3:35 pm^ Gold.
12 years ago at 5:14 pmZing!
12 years ago at 5:16 pm“They’re a lot easier to drug when drunk!”- every Pike
12 years ago at 3:37 pm“I love Pike, roofies all around!” – Captain Frat Sparrow
12 years ago at 8:57 pm26. Taunting you into taking a vodka pull with her and she projectiles 3 seconds into it.
12 years ago at 3:40 pmBetter yet, insisting you take a pull of vodka and not informing you that there are handcuff keys in the bottle, and then getting pissed off at you when the unknown solid substance hits your mouth and you spit it back into the bottle.
12 years ago at 3:58 pm26. Gladly inviting the cops into the house after you specifically tell her not to.
12 years ago at 4:00 pm27. Wake up talking about pressing charges.
12 years ago at 3:41 pmPA
12 years ago at 5:36 pmI like a little lip biting action. They just need to use a little care.
12 years ago at 3:44 pmDude, they’re drunk. Who has ever used “a little care” when drunk?
12 years ago at 2:31 pm^ there is a huge difference between a sexy nibble or pull and her chewing on fucking leather. A little care is the former, not the latter, anyone who isn’t a fucking Neanderthal knows that.
12 years ago at 5:24 pmWhat part of that response had anything to do with my comment? I’m saying drunk people are incapable of lightly doing something. Try playfully pushing a chick when you’re hammered. I guarantee she’ll get hang time.
12 years ago at 6:31 pmYou must be the Incredible Hulk then
12 years ago at 6:49 pm^^This
12 years ago at 11:32 amHang Time for days
This is what you have to bring to the table, TFM? Seriously?
12 years ago at 3:44 pmIf you don’t relate to this column, then you probably haven’t been around very many drunk women.
Of course with a name like “fratslammin” I could have assumed as much.
12 years ago at 2:37 pmI particularly disliked the girl that thought she was capable of breaking up a fight. She’d get too close, an elbow would fly loose and hit her, and then she’d run around telling everyone the fraternity brothers hits girls when the entire situation was completely her fault and completely avoidable.
12 years ago at 3:47 pmWe must go to the same parties.
12 years ago at 1:23 pm