56 Names You Could Give Your Package
If you haven’t named your penis, I’m not sure what’s wrong with you. Maybe you’re just an uncreative person who hates fun. Maybe you haven’t quite found that perfect name. Maybe you’re going back and forth because you’re not sure if you want to name just your schlong, or if you want an encompassing nickname for the whole package. Either way, here are a few ideas to help get you rolling.
- Ricky Wiggle and the Shootaround Boys
- Doctor Grouchsteel
- Rainbow Thunderclap III
- Billy Rope-a-Dope
- Old Hickory
- Peter Dinklage
- Sir Percival Bratwurst
- Meat McGreet
- Jordan and the Bulls
- Walter Rodstein
- The Nut Butler
- Fat Man and the Little Boys
- Dong Juan
- The Joyota Slamry
- Brad
- Jabba the Uncutt
- Mr. Knock-Knock
- Ken Stiffy, Jr.
- The Transcuntinental Railrod
- Urethra Franklin
- Hank Geyserton
- The Sperm Worm
- Santa’s Sleigh
- Chuck Boneroo
- Boompop
- His Holiness, Pipe Sextus
- Barry Beefstick
- The Honey Ham Zone
- Weenie the Pooh
- The Eye Dotter
- Mayor McSpeez
- Jizzly Bear
- Charlie Watkins and the Juicemen
- Professor SeXavior
- Marky Mark and the Spunky Bunch
- The Bone Phone
- Jimmy Spankwhistle
- Spewbacca
- DJ Jizzy Jeff and the Fresh Princes
- Space Shuttle Columbia
- The Vagina Rack
- Crosby, Stills, and Nash (I guess that makes Neil Young the asshole.)
- The Girthy Five-Layer Burrito
- Rammstein
- The Jive Turkey
- Pepé the Crying Clown
- The Chief of Staff
- Baron von Schlongerwiess
- Harry and the Hendersons
- Major Stiffy
- Slamson
- Spank Aaron
- The Hamburgler
- Sergeant Firestorm
- Roger Skinpole
- Trouser Bowser
TFM bringing us the hard-hitting stories.
10 years ago at 11:09 amSlow day at the office?
10 years ago at 11:10 amThat’s a pretty good name actually.
10 years ago at 3:04 am“The bone phone’s ringing. It’s for you”
10 years ago at 11:27 amDNA Rifle
10 years ago at 11:28 amMine is named The Micropenis. Seriously, that was the prognosis from the doctor
10 years ago at 11:33 amThe Octagon and his sidekicks, James Westfall & Dr. Kenneth Noisewater.
10 years ago at 11:37 amBrad…just fucking Brad.
10 years ago at 11:45 amPessimus Prime
10 years ago at 11:46 am“Harry & the Hendersons.” Lost my shit.
10 years ago at 12:25 pmPee-on and The Belmonts
10 years ago at 12:47 pm