6 Frattiest Characters In John Hughes Movies

Ferris12 years ago

John Hughes was a filmmaker who is best known for some of the greatest high school films of the 1980s, if not all time. Although many Hughes films centered on the plight of the poor and outcast, he did have plenty of characters that exemplified the fraternity lifestyle.

Here’s a look at six of the frattiest movie characters that Hughes had to offer (aside from Johnny Lawrence):

5 & 6. Ian and Max from Weird Science

“Bigger tits.”

Alright, so the first two are a tie. Weird Science, for anyone who doesn’t know, is the story of how two GDIs, Wyatt and Gary, use a magical 1980s computer to create a virtual woman who they can have sex with. It’s really fucked up. Max and Ian, on the other hand, are both complete assholes and are introduced to the audience when they pants Wyatt and Gary in front of a gym full of girls. Wyatt and Gary long for the approval, and girlfriends, of these two gentlemen so badly that they trade away their magic computer goddess and even try to make a second one for their new friends.

The fact that Ian was played by a young, coked-up RDJ also helps.

4. Andrew Clark in The Breakfast Club

“You ask me one more question and I’m beating the shit out of you.”

One of Emilio Estevez’s earliest roles quickly established him as an athlete with powerful pulling potential. Only Andrew saw the potential in the basket-case stuck in detention with him, and after she gets a quick makeover from Molly Ringwald, he decides to see what happens. Plus, the reason behind Clark’s punishment, taping a GDI’s ass cheeks together, is pretty funny, although a little fucked up.

3. John Bender in The Breakfast Club

“Hey, homeboy, what do you say we close that door, we’ll get the prom queen impregnated.”

If Clark was the fraternity’s golden boy, Bender is the one most likely to get the charter revoked. Bender spends the day giving Vernon shit about his wardrobe and generally doing whatever the fuck he wants. He even provides the entire group with some potent weed that gets Molly Ringwald’s character loose enough to make out and possibly more. After the film’s earlier discussion about how she’s going to have a “white wedding,” it seems like Bender added a V-card to his collection shortly after the credits rolled.

2. Clark Griswold

“This is crazy, this is crazy, this is crazy!”

A lot of people forget that John Hughes wrote National Lampoon’s Vacation, a film that is only second to Animal House within the National Lampoon brand. Clark Griswold is a hard-working family man who likes to wear shorts and polos, drink beer and flirt with Christie Brinkley before ultimately going skinny-dipping with Billy Joel’s ex-wife. When Clark isn’t eye-fucking Christie Brinkley, he spends most of his time trying to fuck his wife, only to be constantly interrupted by his kids and Aunt Edna. Hey, if you give a man blue-balls from Chicago to California, he’s bound to do some crazy shit like hold a park security guard hostage just to ride a few roller coasters.

1. Ferris Bueller

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

Of course, the top slot goes to Ferris Bueller, a high school senior who skipped school and spent the day in Chicago with his girlfriend and best friend. Ferris understands the importance of dressing well and appreciates fine cars, as he wears a full suit to pick up his girlfriend from school in a 1961 Ferrari GT California. Ferris spends the day doing whatever he wants: fine dining, catching a baseball game and even hijacking a parade float. The best part? Ferris faces no consequences for his actions. Cameron is fucked, we all know that, but Ferris got away with everything, despite Mr. Rooney devoting an entire day to catching him. Everything about Ferris was frat and we can only imagine what he did in college.

Honorable mention goes to Charlie Sheen’s unnamed character who got Jeanie’s freak flag flying within five minutes of meeting Ferris’s repressed sister.