FAIL FRIDAY: Sexual Attack Helicopter
Ten real submissions, 20 photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.
Shooting an empty Coors Light can in your backyard with a 22…while getting a blowy. TFM.
Well, no one can accuse you of not trying.
Consoling a girl who just broke up with her geed boyfriend…by giving her tons of frock. TFM.
Well, no one can accuse you of being unsympathetic.
Wearing American flag Chubbies to meet her parents. TFM.
“You gotta be fucking shittin’ me.” -Her Dad
Got the entire lyrics to “I Believe I Can Fly” tatted on my left rib cage. It got me laid 12 times last week, by girls. TFM.
I don’t doubt this. That song is beautiful.
Dad: “Want to meet at Chick-fil-A?” Me: “Sure, mine or yours?” TFM. #franchiseowners #richaf #upwardsof3millionayearinsales #FaF
FIGHT ME. PLEASE FIGHT ME.
I get so excited when I’m putting my hand down a girl’s Norts for the first time to see if there are pubes there or not! The only thing I can compare it to is opening up a pack of Upper Deck and seeing if I got a Cal Ripken Jr. or Barry Bonds card. TFM.
This guy will be permanently institutionalized by age 25.
Family lawyer recommended I take out a 3 billion dollar insurance plan on my frock ‘n balls. TFM.
Gotta protect your most valuable assets.
My father being the father of two, my name is Ralph and my sister’s name is Lauren. TFM.
Your dad is a try-hard tool, Ralph.
Tell me y’all’s favorite fratty brands!
Who the hell are you? Nice submission. Get the fuck out of here.
I sexually identify as an attack helicopter. Ever since I was a boy, I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I’m fucking retarded, but I don’t care. I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege liberal cunts. TFTC.
I need a beer.
HOLY SHIT INTERN YOU GOT FAIL FRIDAY OUT BEFORE NOON. Rabble Rabble Rabble Rabble Rabble
10 years ago at 11:56 amRABBLE RABBLE INSTAGRAM BABE OF THE DAY: https://totalfratmove.wpengine.com/instagram-babe-of-the-day-jessica-from-university-of-arizona/
10 years ago at 12:15 pm10 years ago at 12:34 pm
You’ve been pretty on point with comments today. Keep up the good work.
10 years ago at 12:17 pmI wouldn’t even let you wash my fuckin’ feet.
10 years ago at 12:21 pmNot you intern, you’re a Fuck up. Fratwurst
10 years ago at 12:23 pmComments like these are why your just a rushee…
10 years ago at 1:46 pmYou’re*
10 years ago at 2:00 pmFrat Santa you’re like fucking 12
10 years ago at 2:10 pmlooks like a downy Thad Castle to me.
10 years ago at 3:45 pmLooks right up Dorns alley
10 years ago at 3:48 pmFrat Santa looks the type of person who has an anon Twitter account that gives RFM advice and has a bow tie with dolphins on it as his picture.
10 years ago at 6:20 pmCongratulating the intern. NF
10 years ago at 2:32 pmLOL what a fail!!!
10 years ago at 11:56 amGet the fuck outta here
10 years ago at 12:07 pmLess.
10 years ago at 11:30 pmGood job intern here is a chaser for your good work
10 years ago at 12:00 pmThanks. Means a lot. (It doesn’t.)
10 years ago at 12:04 pmPlease limit your comments on each article to 1
10 years ago at 12:26 pmFratwurst should limit it to 0
10 years ago at 12:42 pmThat last picture?
10 years ago at 12:01 pm“…by girls”. Glad he had to clear that up.
10 years ago at 12:01 pmDamn youre on time today intern. Fuck yourself.
10 years ago at 12:04 pmYou’re the guy that makes everyone in your fraternity be like, “We fucked up.”
10 years ago at 12:11 pmNext time.
10 years ago at 12:20 pmHaving to specify that you got laid “by girls.” NF
10 years ago at 12:05 pm“No longer a virgin.”
Wanna know how we know thats not fucking true?
10 years ago at 12:05 pmYeah, how?
10 years ago at 1:06 pmYou suck at this site.
10 years ago at 4:37 pmNaked ginger photobomb. TFTC.
10 years ago at 12:06 pmYeah, I posted that with the intent of making the photos section.
10 years ago at 1:12 pmThat’s the intent that every photo is posted with..
10 years ago at 1:27 pmI don’t know about you, but I have posted photos with the intent of making fail Friday before.
10 years ago at 2:17 pmThe guy with the dildo in his mouth is the intern.
10 years ago at 12:10 pmWould it melt your brain if I said it really was?
10 years ago at 12:12 pm