Marshawn Lynch Fined $20,000 For “Hold My Dick” Taunt, NFL Proceeds To Sell Photo Of Said Taunt
10 years ago

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The complete disregard Marshawn Lynch has for NFL suits is what makes “Beast Mode” one of the few likable aspects of a Seattle Seahawks franchise that is otherwise completely nauseating. This is the same team that refers to its fans as “Twelves,” after all.

Lynch racked up an impressive amount of fines from the league throughout the season to the point where I’m almost positive, by the end of Super Bowl week, he will have played the season free of charge. Seriously, Marshawn, for your own financial wellbeing, go to Media Day on Tuesday and give your patent one-word answers. They’re still more insightful than a Bill Belichick press conference.

Marshawn’s latest bill from the NFL was to the ring of 20 large for grabbing his junk while scoring the go-ahead touchdown against the Packers in the fourth quarter of the NFC Championship.

Lynch has essentially made the “hold my dick” taunt his own, and he was fined $11,050 for it earlier in the season.

Due to Lynch’s love of Michael Jackson-ing his way into the end zone, the NFL has issued a warning to the eighth-year running back for the Super Bowl.

From ESPN:

The NFL’s head of officiating told ESPN’s Sal Paolantonio at Pro Bowl practice Saturday that the Seattle Seahawks have been warned that if running back Marshawn Lynch makes an obscene gesture after scoring a touchdown or at any other time during Super Bowl XLIX, the team will be penalized 15 yards for unsportsmanlike conduct.

“The Shield” will simply not let such an egregious act of profanity stand.

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However, it will try to profit off of said act.

The NFL has since seen the error in its ways — or is hastily reacting to public perception once again — and has taken this hot-ticket item off the shelf. Sadly, you no longer can drop $150 on an NFC Championship memorabilia plaque featuring Lynch going Beast Mode on his space needle.

How poetic would it be, though, if Lynch scores a last-second game-winning touchdown while executing the gesture. “Hold my dick” would be forever immortalized into the sport’s biggest game. Hell, I’ll settle for Lynch to nonchalantly pull it off in the background of a semi-important play.

Never change, Marshawn.

[via ESPN]

Image via Shutterstock

  3. Lord Social Chair

    Its almost like I read this 3 hours ago on a different site.
    O wait I did do that

    10 years ago at 1:49 pm
  4. TheGreatCornholio

    I’m sick of the Seahawks but you gotta admit, Marshawn Lynch is pretty fucking awesome.

    10 years ago at 1:53 pm
  6. StarShieldandLamp

    So the Patriots get away with altering the game in their favor, and the NFL only gives a shit about Lynch. Makes complete sense.

    10 years ago at 2:02 pm
    1. Frat Bull

      They had the “game altering balls” replaced in the second half and out scored the Colts 28-0, so I’d say those 1.5lbs did not matter in effecting the out come of the game. But I agree, the NFL is severely over reacting to Lynch’s TD celebration.

      10 years ago at 3:04 pm
    2. LeGronk

      You honestly think that they are the only team that is “under” inflating the footballs?

      10 years ago at 3:14 pm
      2. WSU

        “Well others are doing it too” isn’t a valid excuse for cheating when you’re competing at this level in professional sports.

        10 years ago at 3:42 pm
      4. Thad_Castle

        Shouldn’t have been caught. Much how fraternities are held to a “strict, non-hazing standard.”

        10 years ago at 9:09 pm
  7. WSU

    It blows my mind how the NFL throws a fit over stuff like this, but sits with their dick in their hand when blatant cheating happens in the playoffs.

    10 years ago at 2:22 pm
    1. Beecher1843

      Not to mention at first trying to profit off of the same stuff they’re “throwing a fit about” until they get called on their BS and don’t have the balls to stand behind it.

      10 years ago at 2:59 pm
  8. beerbong_in_my_pants

    At least the NFL takes care of issues as big as this. Blatant cheating and domestic violence don’t compare to a offhanded obscene gesture

    10 years ago at 2:26 pm