Black Brett Favre Of Preachers Throws Holy Ghost Hail Marys Into Congregation, Chaos Ensues
11 years ago

This guy is the real deal. Look at that arm. You can’t get a tighter spiral on that Holy Ghost Hail Mary.

“You want something? TAKE IT! That’s yours tonight. You want it? You want it? TAKE IT! You want it tonight? TAKE IT! The poweroftheholyghost! TAKE IT! Ohhh TAKE IT! TAKE IT! TAKE IT! That’s the poweroftheholyghost! The (inaudible) of the Holy Ghost! You want it? You want it? TAKE IT! That’s the poweroftheholyghost! You want it tonight? You want it? TAKE IT! That’s the poweroftheholyghost! Ohhh you want something? You ready for something? You ready for something? TAKE IT! That’s the poweroftheholyghost! My my my my my my my! WooooWHA! The (inaudible) of the Holy Ghost! The (inaudible) of the Holy Ghost! The (inaudible) of the Holy Ghost! AHHHYA!” -Me next time I have sex

The pastor at my church sucks ass. White church in general sucks ass. How come I’ve never had the black Brett Favre of preachers toss an invisible Hail Mary pass my way? Why hasn’t anyone lobbed a Holy Ghost hand grenade in my general direction during Sunday service? I want the spirit of God to knock me on my motherfucking ass. I want to be decimated by a holy explosion that sends me flying from my pew. I demand an explanation.

At best, a few folks in the front row of my church will get turnt on the Spirit and raise their hands to the sky while the choir sings, but the turn up has never gotten anywhere near as real as the turn up gets in this video. I don’t know if I just joined the wrong church, or I’m taking the wrong drugs, or my pastor is just a fraud, but if I’m not leveled by a sonic boom of spirituality this coming Sunday, I will not be tithing.

[via Post Grad Problems]

  3. Unchecked_White_Privilege

    WR Bolen,
    Do you love America?
    1. You laugh at 9/11 victims
    2. You think White history is offensive
    3. ….and now you mock the White Christian faith.

    11 years ago at 11:40 am
  4. Gov_Lester Maddox

    Being A Christian is only cultural. You know, like the Jews have been doing for decades. We’re all smart enough to know that Mary was no virgin and Jesus had shitty friends that didn’t tell him when enough was enough. The Gideon’s should start putting Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone in hotels instead of bibles, it’ll do more good.

    11 years ago at 11:47 am
    1. Dick_Nixon

      I’m thinking you’re on the wrong site here, bud. Do you have any idea what the target audience of TFM is?

      11 years ago at 11:56 am
      1. Gov_Lester Maddox

        Im not saying don’t go to church. You’re mom would disown you… But don’t actually believe the nonsense.

        11 years ago at 12:01 pm
    2. Gov_Lester Maddox

      We’ve got some serious bible beaters on this website. I didn’t know you were all so Christ-like.

      11 years ago at 12:56 pm
      1. soldier_for_freedom

        The Gideons are great people! I can’t tell you how many times I read the bible they offered me at basic training. I didn’t bring mine since I figured it was going to be stuck in my civilian bag locked away. They do a great service by helping out and giving bibles to those entering basic and other initial training for various branches. You are at the wrong place and better leave.

        11 years ago at 9:21 pm