Racism And Greek Life

Racism And Greek Life

I got asked by some comedian friends about my thoughts on the Oklahoma SAE story. That felt a little weird, but I’ve written for a site called TotalFratMove.com about rape, death, and Taylor Swift, so I guess I’ve put myself in the position to be asked. It’s like being the one Jewish guy in a fraternity: You’re basically the house rabbi. If I had a nickel for every time I was asked a question about Jews, I’d have a ton of nickels, and I’d save them appropriately in a Roth IRA. I just don’t know what opinion there is to have other than, “this sucks.” It sucks in the “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” way that I’m pretty sure echoes the majority of Greeks and Greek alumni.

It’s not only the action, it’s everything that comes with it in 2015. The people who lazily write “think pieces” about fraternities and their racism issues while they casually ignore that there are people of every race involved with Greek life. There are armchair activists racing to the top of Judgment Mountain to write a “racism is bad” post on Facebook. Of course there should be outrage, but it all feels a little easy. Today, it isn’t just the people who commit the crimes who get in trouble; it’s every group these people represent. So when a southern fraternity is explicitly racist and spews hate speech, it affects every box that this group checks off: Greeks, southerners, Oklahomans, men, and white people. All of these groups are all a little more racist to everyone they come in contact with, and that really sucks.

But that’s the thing — we all don’t suck. I would say most people associated with Greek life are currently throwing their hands up and trying to form some sort of opinion that rationalizes why a group of people would be gleefully singing such crap. I tried the other night. I rambled on about how these songs have words that I can’t believe these kids connect to any real sort of hatred. In a very extreme example, I tried saying that if every time they sang this song, a black person died, they’d have known the severity and wouldn’t sing it. I’m sure I’m not the only one who bumbled along in such extremes because at the end of the day, I’m really trying to protect myself. I’m trying to tell anyone who sees me as a former “frat guy” that I wasn’t on my own bus with my own friends doing the same thing. In a time where the criticism lands on a group over the individual acting in extremes, you’re a guy who could have been on that bus. These guys aren’t you or your brothers, but they represent some piece of who you are or where you came from. Just ask any SAE across the country how many times he’s said the phrase, “they’re different at every school” this week and you’ll realize how far this spreads.

Every week, the internet serves us these strongly-worded reactions to extremes, whether it’s blaming all Muslims for the actions of ISIS or al-Qaeda or convicting an entire race when a criminal happens to be black. The vast majority of the free-thinking world exists outside of these extreme examples. The world is nuanced and can’t always be packaged into tidy generalizations. This story shouldn’t be a surprise — racism exists — but it also shouldn’t be the launching pad for a tirade against anyone who has worn some Greek letters. The more we lazily swim with the current of “these people are this way” and “those people are that way,” the more we create these very particular niches. We act less like a country full of people just trying to live our lives and more like a group of bros, hipsters, nerds, blacks, and whites who live near one another and just have to put up with it. The finger-pointers are giving out jerseys so you have to hope your team isn’t the “bad guy.”

A lot of pledge programs have this rule: If one person messes up, so does the whole group. The same goes for life. Oklahomans, southerners, Greeks, SAEs, and white people are all wearing the burden of this stupidity because one of “theirs” did something bad. That rule works for a pledge class because it makes them accountable for one another and brings them together as friends. In real life, that attitude is just an easy way to distinguish between “us” and “them,” “good” and “bad,” “black” and “white.” And it seems like a giant step backward that’s too easy to take.

    1. randomblackchick

      As everyone else mentioned, this is a really thought provoking article. People are so quick to react to the media that they 1) Fail to put it in perspective, since the media profits by stirring up controversy and invoking fear and outrage, and 2) Don’t take the time to look at things from the other side’s perspective. This is so simple, yet so important, and I believe that without doing this, people lack empathy an understanding, which is an integral part of being human.

      When I first read about the OU SAE incident, I felt so many things at once: shock, anger, sadness, pain, and even fear.

      However, later that night in bed I closed my eyes and tried to see things from these guy’s perspective. They were young, drunk, not thinking about the consequences, and saying something stupid but it’s highly unlikely they were doing it to hurt others, because they were doing it in a setting that those who would be hurt most by it wouldn’t EVER see or hear it ( of course, they obviously thought wrong in this instance).

      I thought about how, many of my best friends growing up have been white, along with my teachers and other adults who have mentored me and had a tremendously positive impact on my life. I think about how I’ve encountered very little racism in my life, and the stark contrast between what my generation has experienced and that of my grandmother and great grandmother, who actuallly experienced racism and saw and experienced things so despicable you absolutely couldn’t imagine ( and meither could I). That really put everythin in perspective for me and instead of reacting immediately, I now have a completely dofferent perspective. I just hope that the frat guys who were just as quick to react and jump to these guys’ defense do the same and just take a moment to really put yourself in an African American person’s shoes. If I listened to the mainstream media, I would feel demonized every day… I am smart, I work hard and come from an extremely hardworking, intelligent, and morally upright family. However, the one thing I can’t change is my skin – I didn’t choose my race, and literally no one else has either. So the natural inclination is to feel hurt by these words, especially knowing the weight and reality of such words for grandmother and greatgrandmother, who actually witnessed the violence spoken of – there are still people alive in today’s world who grew up in that reality. If I just went by the news, I would feel upset because people might assume that I’m stupid, lazy, poor, “ghetto”, fat, ugly, or some morally reprehensible criminal just because of the color of my skin ( and even though most people know that not all blacks fall into these categories, it’s been implied in the tfm comment section that blacks in general are all these things). I don’t, however, see this as any different as people assume all Greeks/whites/men etc. are ________.
      I think the more people try to see things from others’ points of view, the more healing will take place and the better our off our country will be.

      11 years ago at 9:23 pm
      1. FratensteinsMonster

        Your ability to separate your personal feelings and fairly weigh the incident in its entirety is really impressive. The media loves to take stories like this that play into the stereotypes that already exist of a group (fraternity men=spoiled, backwards, racist meatheads; black people =criminals, govt. dependents) and cover them to the point where it’s almost nauseating. They generate massive amounts of viewers and money, but I think we’re seeing the results of this media irresponsibility with the racial and class divide that seems to be growing daily in this country.

        11 years ago at 7:30 pm
  1. TTUGreek

    I could not agree with you more, man. The reality of is, is that these guys were chanting this because they thought it made them look cool. They thought it made them sound cool, and unfortunately, they have now hurt countless groups of people. Racism now compared to racism 60 years ago are two very, very different things. Racism now includes stuff like crossing the street whenever a white person sees a black person. Or stuff like using the n-word without cutting off the “r”. Racism 60 years ago included white people not allowing blacks in their store simply because of the color of their skin. The weight of our words today differs greatly from previous generations. I’m not excusing their behavior, but these kids are not hateful people. They’re just dumb college kids who don’t know any better. I’m sorry, but in a way, this thing has spiraled out of control. It’s a sad testament to our inability to see things for what they are and not for what they might be. Words only carry weight If you allow them to. People love controversy, and see everything as such. It’s such a shame, man.

    11 years ago at 12:15 pm
    1. greedy lawyer

      This is a really thoughtful comment. Sometimes it’s hard to describe racism, but you nailed it. Things like catching a cab, traffic stops and being followed in the store is what I deal with. As you said, these kids are just being stupid and aren’t on my radar.

      I also have a problem with people that can’t let things play out before reacting. I think the SAE took the correct steps in handling this issue. I don’t think I’ve seen a faster eviction. I even felt sorry for the members. It was a powerful message and I’m sure others frats took note.

      That moment told me everything I needed to know about the organization as a whole. Unfortunately, they are not getting the credit they deserve.

      11 years ago at 2:23 pm
    2. RisingFratstarOfTX

      Even trying to be PC is a trap for racism. Louis CK says saying “the ‘N’ word” is just as bad as saying the word itself. When you say a word, you put the word in the listeners head. Saying “the ‘N’ word” puts the actual word in my head, which isn’t fair. Why should I feel bad because you’re too lazy to say the whole word?

      11 years ago at 3:31 pm
    3. Presidente

      I think society has come a long ways in general. I was talking to some family who said blacks used to step off the sidewalk to let whites pass. Lets hope we can continue to improve as a whole.

      Don’t judge a book by its cover, and don’t let a few rotten apples spoil the whole bunch.

      11 years ago at 4:31 pm
  2. FratShannon69

    As usual, it’s obvious you are way to talented to be writing for this site. Great job.

    11 years ago at 12:16 pm
  3. LouFerrigno

    “The finger-pointers are giving out jerseys so you have to hope your team isn’t the “bad guy.”

    Well said JTrain. I hope more people read this and actually take something from it, this is far better than any “17 reasons why being in a frat is frat” list.

    11 years ago at 12:17 pm
  4. not enough beer

    My class was always told “you’re now representing something greater than yourself”. I never realized the extent of this statement until last week. It’s almost tough to walk down the street in letters because you know there are those who are assuming guilt by association. As always jtrain, wonderful job. I hope the Greek community can overcome these negative stereotypes swiftly.

    11 years ago at 12:18 pm
  5. NYUFratter

    Unrelated, but is SGA President at UA as important as people make it sound? Our student government seems irrelevant and I can’t name a single person on it

    11 years ago at 12:21 pm