Man Tries To Get Assault Charge Dropped By Showing Victim His Penis
This is a classic love story of man assaulting woman, woman filing charges, man showing woman penis in attempt to get said assault charges dropped.
From Al.com:
A Tuscaloosa man was arrested Wednesday and charged with indecent exposure after he allegedly showed a woman his penis in an attempt to persuade her to drop assault charges she’d previously filed against him.
According to court documents filed Thursday, 32-year-old Wiley Lee Sanders was arrested last month and charged with third-degree assault. Sanders was arrested again Wednesday and charged with indecent exposure.
How does a man make it up to a woman he has so deeply wronged? Flowers? Chocolates? An acoustic cover of “Wonderwall”?
Nay. One cannot salvage a budding romance from an error of this magnitude with merely a gift from the heart. It has to be from somewhere far more special: the pants.
I imagine our Romeo standing beneath the balcony of the woman he loves, dick out, beseeching to her through the art of Shakespearean prose.
Dost thou charges remain to stand,
If I come to you,
Heart and dick in hand?
Lay thine eyes upon my cock,
And like my trousers,
Charges drop.
Oh, fair lady!
Why do you mock me so?
It’s cold outside, if you must know.
I’m surprised this didn’t work out for him..
[via Al.com]
Image via 6th Judicial Circuit State of Alabama
explaining your frock “with It’s cold outside”…. In Alabama. TFM.
10 years ago at 11:34 amShut up Meg.
10 years ago at 11:44 amFuck you.
10 years ago at 12:36 pmThey return forward the boxes.
10 years ago at 12:57 pmShutupmeg is just as shitty as sharkweektfm
10 years ago at 4:45 pmI never repeat myself, but i will in this case. Fuck you.
10 years ago at 6:34 pmYou can’t start rating members when you’re the one who’s just posting incendiary comments to piss people off. Get the fuck out Christ Omega.
10 years ago at 10:07 pmRoll Tide!
10 years ago at 11:34 amFuck off
10 years ago at 12:34 pmHe should have gone with dick-in-a-box
10 years ago at 11:38 amHa.
10 years ago at 12:25 pmWhat a bitch. Wiley was clearly trying to right a wrong and that’s how she treats him
10 years ago at 11:48 amAssuming she wants to see your penis. TFM
10 years ago at 11:54 amPenis. The censored word is penis. A scientific name for a genital. Thats a whole new level TFM.
10 years ago at 12:03 pmExactly what you’d expect out of Tuscaloosa. Probably a Bama alum
10 years ago at 12:09 pmWiley Lee Sanders what a fucking name
10 years ago at 12:14 pmHe must have thought he was in a Brazzers video and that it was actually a good idea.
10 years ago at 12:28 pmThere’s definitely a dorn joke in here somewhere
10 years ago at 12:33 pm