New York Mafia Promises To Protect The Big Apple From ISIS
Nobody loves a good mafia story like I do. The Sopranos? My favorite television series. GoodFellas? Maybe not as good as FratFellas, but still one of my favorite films.
Basically, if a story has a plot-line that involves the mafia or a casino, I am all in. Hell, just writing about this stuff has me craving baked ziti so bad I’m about to Favor it to my front door.
A son of a prolific New York mobster made the news this week after promising that the mafia would do its best to protect New York City from ISIS. During an interview with a local television station, Giovanni Gambino said “the rise of global terrorism gives the Mafia a chance to show its good side.”
From The New York Post:
The son of infamous mob figure John Gambino says the La Cosa Nostra is ready to fight ISIS in New York City — and that the Mafia can do a better job of protecting the city from terror attacks than the NYPD.
Giovanni Gambino said during an interview with NBC that “the rise of global terrorism gives the Mafia a chance to show its good side.”
“We make sure our friends and families are protected from extremists and terrorists, especially . . . the Islamic State,” Gambino said.
I like to imagine a dramatic pause in place of that ellipsis. The mafia will not be trifled with, ISIS. I know you’re a new money organization that thinks it can waltz in wherever it wants and cause mayhem, but crime in New York has been an established practice for generations — and you don’t stand a fucking chance.
It’s kind of funny that the mafia even bothered to release a statement about this, clearly in search of some good PR. I guess somebody finally found [commence New York Italian accent sequence] Donny’s cousin washed up on the banks of the East River and needed to pull a quick one on the media [End sequence].
A Mafia-ISIS shootout with a bunch of overweight balding Italian men curbstomping some fucking terrorists? I think I smell the next big Scorsese hit..
[via New York Post]
Image via YouTube
It’s amazing how people can unite in defense of one-another.
10 years ago at 12:34 pmIt restores some faith in humanity with all the bullshit that’s been unfolding as of late
10 years ago at 12:54 pm“You will fail because you are trying to destroy something you hate, we will win because we are defending something we love”.
10 years ago at 12:39 pmNow if only they’d be charitable enough to make Steve Holt “have an accident”, we’d all have a Happy Thanksgiving.
10 years ago at 12:39 pmYou see this knife? I’m gonna teach you to speak English with this fucking knife-Bill from Gangs of New York
10 years ago at 12:41 pmCan’t wait for an ISIS member to wake up with a bloody camel head in his bed.
10 years ago at 12:46 pm*goat head
10 years ago at 1:51 pm*pig head
10 years ago at 2:06 pmBecause they believe if they touch a dead pig they will not be able to get into heaven…whatever fuck you all
10 years ago at 8:46 pmMost people don’t care enough about Islam to know this stuff, especially on sites like this.
10 years ago at 11:06 pmThat would just end with him fucking it.
10 years ago at 1:55 pmA lá David Cameron
10 years ago at 2:44 pmI hope the Mafia gets you cement shoes and swimming lessons, Steve Holt.
10 years ago at 12:53 pmCould you not? This is Stevens safe space.
10 years ago at 2:11 pmYou know the world is changing when we’re not all agreeing on Steve Holt hate comments.
10 years ago at 11:09 pmAs an Italian, it’s good to see one of the families finally stepping up to the plate on this. Send those towelheads back to the wasteland they came from in a body bag.
10 years ago at 12:53 pmTop tier name and picture
10 years ago at 1:31 pmThank you for supporting my hatred of fruits.
10 years ago at 2:37 pmNow Italians don’t have to be ashamed of our past
10 years ago at 2:36 pmDoesn’t erase Growing up Gotti and Jersey Shore…
10 years ago at 5:26 pmI wish it could erase the fact that your in Sammy
10 years ago at 7:14 pmAre we just gonna ignore The Godfather as the best mafia movie?
10 years ago at 1:36 pmDefinitely not, but we’re gonna ignore that they released a Part III.
10 years ago at 9:11 pmFair enough
10 years ago at 3:12 pmEyyy, ohhh, you gots terrorists giving ya troubles, New York? Jus gimme an’ my cousins a call, bada boom, bada bing, theys sleepin with da fishes at the bottom of the Hudson! Pass the gabagool!
10 years ago at 1:45 pmFirst of all, your all done. The gambling family don’t even have that kind of muscle anymore. The Dons sick right? Your getting chased out of New York by Barzini and the other families.
10 years ago at 2:39 pmWow, you must be a part of the mob!
10 years ago at 4:03 pmCan’t recognize a moe green quote? Time to start questioning your masculinity buddy
10 years ago at 4:47 pm