Make Your Christmas Day Better By Winning Fat Cash Playing Fantasy Basketball

Santa is coming to town and he’s bringing fat stacks of cash for you to make it rain at the bars. Since you’re poor and need some money, I’m here to fix that problem. See, DraftKings is here to get you out of your little financial situation and back to the baller status you used to know.

Enter the $400,000 Contest NOW FOR FREE

Our good friends over at DraftKings are holding a special contest just for TFM readers. In this week’s NBA $400K fantasy basketball contest, you’ll have the chance to take home $30,000. With that kind of cash, you will dominate New Year’s Eve. All the girls will recognize your baller status and flock to you.

Fantasy basketball is so easy to understand that even your mom baking Christmas cookies in the kitchen can play this shit. You’re given $50,000 in cap space to put togetherĀ a team that will score the most points, grab the most boards, nail the most threes, and block the most shots. Easy.

Over 33,000 players are guaranteed to win money in this contest. If you aren’t in the top 33,000, then you should go back to something you excel at like simple math problems. The contest begins on Friday, December 25th.

Enter The Contest NOW FOR FREE

If you’re new to DraftKings then your entry fee is completely covered. If you’re a pro like I am, then it only costs $3 to enter. Everyone has $3 this time of year. Even the homeless dude down the street has it. Where else can you turn $3 into $30K? Nowhere, that’s where.

Sign up now, and draft your team before the contest fills up.

  1. Frabst

    I hope your mom makes porn to give you a better Christmas but blows it on crack instead.

    10 years ago at 12:11 pm
  2. Tuco_1855

    I would enter but Illinois just made daily fantasy sports illegal because the state is poor, crooked, and polluted with liberals.

    10 years ago at 5:53 pm
  3. BACoverGPA

    Can you make a ‘take a lap’ button for articles so we can tell you when you post shit?

    10 years ago at 12:21 am
  4. DontQuitPledge

    I really just fucking skipped an ad to read an ad GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER PLEDGE

    10 years ago at 1:50 am