New TFM Tanks For Spring Break 2016

Making the most of Spring Break is all about going in with the right state of mind. It’s essential to set the tone early that you’re there to fuck shit up and be as reprehensible as humanly possible. Any asshole can brashly boast to the world with his words, but a real pipe-laying aficionado lets his inappropriate tank top do the talking. Pretty sure that’s word for word a Teddy Roosevelt quote — and he was a bad motherfucker who crushed copious amounts of ass.

“But just how aggressive do I need to get when I purchase my tank?” If you have to ask that question you’re probably not ready, kid. Luckily, we perfected a collection of sleeveless shirts with just the right amount of obnoxiousness. Now you don’t have to worry about coming up with a humorous slogan and dealing with getting enough brothers to buy in bulk from some sketchy shirt company around campus. We partnered up with our friends at Tilt, and developed these tanks that will have you rolling in puss, and just being general crowd pleasers wherever you go.

Like any good party planned via Tilt, we need to make sure enough of you are on board. If 100 people don’t buy the shirt, we won’t make it. That’s why we need you to rally the troops and spread the word about four of the most barbaric tank tops created in human history.

Click your favorite tank to get the ball rolling. Thank us later.

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  1. Northern Fratmosphere

    I can’t put into words how fucking terrible these shirts are. You are an actual company with an actual retail and marketing team, and this is the shit you come up with? An all around swing and a miss for TFM.

    9 years ago at 1:04 pm
    1. Sean Conneryy

      Speaking of those horrible shirts I left a couple of them at your moms, could you remind her to return them to me? Thank you, Trebek

      9 years ago at 3:48 pm
  2. fortheGipper

    “Rush boobs do not reflect company values”

    “Legalize cocaine”

    TTFMM

    9 years ago at 1:24 pm
    1. thaisticktony

      Gotta love that this article follows one on how not to dress as a try hard.

      9 years ago at 6:35 pm
  3. Frabst

    Dorn hates fajitas so it makes sense that they would put out such garbage quality clothing. Peasant taste in food leads to peasant taste in clothes.

    9 years ago at 2:31 pm