Man Accidentally Interrupts Two People Having Car Sex, Chaos Ensues, Story Captivates Internet

Harrison Lee10 years ago

I was walking my dog round East Finchley, late, two nights ago. Chasing foxes, that kind of thing. And I heard a noise.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

I heard muffled screaming & saw the boot of a car rattling. Oh no, I thought – someone's trapped in the boot!

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

It was a small hatchback. A renault clio, I think. But still big enough that someone could conceivably be trapped in the boot.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

Couldn't see inside the car cos it was dark but as I got closer I was sure that there were screams coming from the boot. Urgent screams.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

My rushed up to the car, pulling my dog with me. The whole car was rattling. "I have to set this person free!" I thought. BUT…

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

I have to do it quickly in case the person who's trapped them comes back. This is DANGEROUS but I am A HERO. My dog is too. Both heroes.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

In a swift, dynamic movement I flung open the boot of the car. The boot light came on. I was staring into the face of a woman!

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

The woman was naked.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

On top of the woman was a man. Also naked.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

They'd put the back seats down & were lying the full length of the car, heads in the boot.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

The woman was clinging on to the boot, rattling it while she screamed. For very different reasons than the ones I had assumed from outside.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

Except now she was no longer screaming, because she was looking up at me, horrified. As was the man. I was holding the boot open.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

What does one say in that situation?

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

I'll tell you what I said. I said: "Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I thought you were trapped. Like a hostage. Because of the screaming and…

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

…the rattling. But I see now you don't need my help. Either of you. And that this is the good kind of screaming. Sorry. Do carry on."

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

Then I started to close the boot – carefully. I didn't want to trap anything. Unfortunately, my dog is very well trained…

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

And my dog loves car journeys.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

So before I could close the boot, Harpo (my dog) did what he's been trained to do when someone opens the boot of a hatchback.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

So before I could close the boot, Harpo (my dog) did what he's been trained to do when someone opens the boot of a hatchback.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

Now it was too late to close the boot. There was more screaming – but not the good kind.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016

Obviously I can't undo Harpo's training, so I said, "Good boy." Which I think gave the wrong impression.

— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016