FAIL FRIDAY: Winter Has Come

Below is the worst user-submitted content of the week in the form of ten TFM’s, 20 photos, and three videos. Names have been omitted to protect the guilty, but God sees all shame. Have yourself a weekend.

Got something you think should be featured in Fail Friday? Email it to tips@totalfratmove.com.

Until I was seventeen years old I thought peeing and cumming were the same exact thing. TFM.

This is why sexual education courses exist.

Paying your dues with money you earned selling baking soda to crackheads in downtown alleyways. TFM.

Probably goes against your fraternity’s moral code if I had to guess.

Respecting women because your mother raised you right, and always having them sign a waiver before requesting that they choke you until you lose consciousness. TFM.

As long as you’re taking the proper legal precautions.

One of my testicles never descended but when I fart it pops out for a second. That’s the only time I really feel like a man. TFM.

Someone desperately needs to kick your ass.

If you’re not sexually attracted to at least one of your pledges, your chapter is bottom tier. TFM.

Have to say I agree with this one, personally.

Similarly to how hazing makes us strong, childhood trauma related to one or more uncles makes us hard. TFM.

The sweet name of fuck?

When you like to be spanked during lovemaking because it reminds you of how your mother used to punish you. TFM.

You need to see multiple therapists.

I drink I smoke I snort I shoot I fuck I whack I haze I blaze I tame the wild spirit of the indian brave. TFM.

I’m at a total loss for what is even going on in these submissions anymore.

When your grandma is stirring the lasagna and you whisper in her ear, “That’s the same noise good pussy made last night.” TFM.

Please never come back here.

Not understanding the appeal of porn because they only thing that gets you off is killing a small animal and then eating it while you stranglebate. TFM.

Multiple serial killer symptoms here.

GET THE OFFICIAL SHIRT OF FAIL FRIDAY

Cute Christmas card.
Cute Christmas card.
He is not well.
He is not well.
That tattoo though.
That tattoo though.
Cocaine pit stains.
Cocaine pit stains.
Sweet paint job.
Sweet paint job.
Hot outfit bruh.
Hot outfit bruh.
He is suffering.
He is suffering.
Sergio is ashamed.
Sergio is ashamed.
Damn son she caught you.
Damn son she caught you.
The Geednd.
The Geednd.
Cringing so hard.
Cringing so hard.
Why post this type of shit?
Why post this type of shit?
Man down, butt out.
Man down, butt out.
You got got.
You got got.
Let it all out.
Let it all out.
Mother of God.
Mother of God.
He done peed his pants.
He done peed his pants.
Damn you people go back to your shanties.
Damn you people go back to your shanties.
Don't call yourselves that.
Don’t call yourselves that.
Sleep tight, sweet prince.
Sleep tight, sweet prince.

Bad Rush Video

A video posted by TFM (@totalfratmove) on

A video posted by TFM (@totalfratmove) on

Chaser

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      1. AndrewsMomsAss

        I’m sure they left it out because they thought you would choke on it! Ha ha I think I’ll be a troll!

        8 years ago at 3:58 am
  1. Fratan

    Can you please provide some statistics on how many “OFFICIAL SHIRT OF FAIL FRIDAYS” you’ve sold? Have to think it hovers somewhere around 0

    8 years ago at 7:38 pm
    1. neyihar

      S­t­a­r­t­­­­­­­­­­ y­o­u­r­­­­­­­­­ h­o­m­e­­­­­­­­ b­u­s­i­n­e­s­s­­­­­­­­­ r­i­g­h­t­­­­­­­­­ n­o­w. Spend­­­­­­ more­­­­­­ time­­­­­­ with­­­­­­ your­­­­­­ family­­­­­­ and­­­­­­ earn. Start­­­­­­ bringing­­­­­­ $60/hr­­­­­­ just­­­­­­ on­­­­­­ a­­­­­­ computer. Very­­­­­­ easy­­­­­­ way­­­­­­to­­­­­­ make­­­­­­ your­­­­­­ life­­­­­­ happy­­­­­­ and­­­­­­ earning­­­­­­ continuously. Start­­­­­­ here””­­­­­­….
      ====>>>
      http://tinylink.net/m35Np

      8 years ago at 2:14 am
    2. richdaddybowtiefrat

      Shut up you NF public school piece of shit. My dad owns the company that sells those T-Shirts and we are bankrolling more in one day than you peasant GDIs will see in your entire life. I dare you to come to my fratcastle at Elon to talk that kind of smack. I’ll be the guy with the $5,000 bow tie and chubbies chugging a handle of Makers on the front porch. If you come, I hope you like the elephant walk. Your move Fratan.

      8 years ago at 3:58 pm
      1. richdaddybowtiefrat

        Hey Butanefratoil, I’m calling the pledges at 4 AM to do the elephant walk and I heard you might want to join? I’ll be eating your girlfriend’s ass on my frat balcony.

        8 years ago at 8:47 pm
      2. richdaddybowtiefrat

        Try hard GDIs like you are going to be put over the wall when Trump takes office in 2017.

        8 years ago at 8:48 pm
      3. richdaddybowtiefrat

        Money just proves that I can lay pipe to your mom on a daily basis and never answer any of her texts. She told me about all the time she caught you jacking off. When your mom asked me if she should swallow, I told her “I don’t know, I ain’t no cocksucker”

        8 years ago at 8:59 pm
      4. Norman.Dale

        I really thought this was supposed to be sarcasm for most of the comment, especially when you said Elon. You do realize that isn’t something to brag about right? Big state schools are where it’s at

        8 years ago at 8:59 pm
      5. richdaddybowtiefrat

        Figures one of my haters would be some geedy peasant fuck who can’t even afford to pay $65K a year for school. The fact that I just banged your girlfriend and nutted on her face is something to brag about. Listen to this hottt track to get a feel for what my life is all about and then try to step up fuckface. #nutinyourface

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtgHiEGGQ4s

        8 years ago at 8:21 pm
      6. richdaddybowtiefrat

        Poor Norman.Dale is too much of a peasant to afford private school and has to live off of the welfare state by going to “big state schools.” Do they let you use your foodstamps at the dining hall Norman.Dale?

        8 years ago at 8:32 pm
      7. richdaddybowtiefrat

        If you knew who my dad was, you wouldn’t be talking that kind of shit. I bet you are some sort of peasant geed minority that they wouldn’t even let step foot at my country club. If you ever say that to my face I’ll get my pledges to hold you down while I jizz in your cargo shorts pocket and take a shit in your mouth, while I have the other pledges chant “FratShannon has a mangina! FratShannon has a mangina!”. That’ll teach you not to mess wit a true boss you peasant. You wish you lived my lavish lifestyle. Fast cars, easy hoes, loud sound systems, 4inch seams, bow ties, blow, and bitches.

        8 years ago at 8:28 pm
      8. richdaddybowtiefrat

        You couldn’t afford to go to Elon you goddamn independent peasant. I hope Trump puts you over the wall.

        8 years ago at 8:42 pm
    1. richdaddybowtiefrat

      How many texts did it take to get your mom to come over to my fratcastle to suck my frat-rocket? One text. You should tell your mom to get off tinder, she thirsty for a real fratgod like me.

      8 years ago at 9:09 pm
    1. TheHangoverCure

      I’d be willing to bet they were leaving, already paid, and his buddy pointed out how he hadn’t touched his waffle

      8 years ago at 2:34 pm
    1. richdaddybowtiefrat

      Yea man Phi Delt is so try hard! They have nothing on Alpha Kappa Psi!!

      8 years ago at 8:53 pm