You Can Stop Running Now, Science Says Cardio Lowers Men’s Sex Drive
If you’re not waking up at the ass crack of dawn for ROTC PT or currently in the midst of a competitive intramural game, there’s already no logical reason for you — as a normal dude in America– to be doing cardio. With no threat of being chased down by a cheetah or African warlord and getting torn to shreds on a day to day basis, who are all these assholes in compression shorts and quarter-zip windbreakers running from anyway? Their insecurities? What look are they even going for? UNICEF poster child? Maybe stop mindlessly jogging to nowhere in particular, Forrest Gump, and pick up a damn weight for me one time.
Not only are you withering away like a bulimic Auschwitz prisoner every time you lace up those hideous neon Asics, throw on a spandex jumpsuit, or dust off the ol’ 10-speed, but — according to science — you’re also significantly lowering your sex drive.
From NCBI:
Exposure to higher levels of chronic intense and greater durations of endurance training on a regular basis are significantly associated with a decreased libido scores in men. Clinicians who treat male patients for sexual disorders and, or council couples on infertility issues should consider the degree of endurance exercise training a man is performing as a potential complicating factor.
You don’t have to tell me not to do cardio twice. I was already way ahead of the game, preaching about the dangers of losing mass. I might just get a Fitbit solely so I don’t exceed a certain amount of steps each day. You can never be too careful, and I don’t want to take any chances. One minute you’re hitting the treadmill for ten minutes after a workout to “cut” or “lean down” and the next minute you’re walking in on your girl getting spin roasted by two guys that can actually get it up. Life comes at you so fast. Say no to cardio..
[via NCBI]

Got kicked out of class for laughing too hard when you brought up the Fitbit
9 years ago at 10:35 amThat funny huh
9 years ago at 10:38 amI mean yeah I thought so. Sorry my sense of humor triggered you bud
9 years ago at 10:44 amTake a knee bud you’re done
9 years ago at 11:40 pmYou seem like the type of freak who would go in dry.
9 years ago at 12:47 pmStop giving him ideas.
9 years ago at 9:48 pmPrincipal must have been pissed you were on your phone in class huh
9 years ago at 2:35 pmYeah man. Called my mom and everything.
9 years ago at 4:45 pmDaydreaming about banging the chicks ass on the treadmill in front of me increases my libido.
9 years ago at 10:45 amI don’t do cardio because these colors don’t run. Fuck ISIS
9 years ago at 11:04 amWe all see through your facade, Dan. Cleverly providing excuses to not get your fat ass on the stair master won’t fool us!!!!
9 years ago at 11:29 ambeing a fat piece of shit is also associated with decreased libido, so better go ahead and plug that treadmill back in Dan
9 years ago at 12:26 pmThe irony of not running to avoid lowering your sex drive. Then getting fat and lowering your sex drive more than cardio ever could have is mind numbing.
9 years ago at 1:05 pmIf your cardio lasts more than 10min, you’ve only been wasting time. After a real workout, HIIT, max effort. I’m tired of seeing fat fucks. And treadmills are for pussies.
9 years ago at 6:22 pmWow bro you must be such a badass!
9 years ago at 11:39 pm“Exposure to higher levels of chronic intense and greater durations of endurance training on a regular basis are significantly associated with a decreased libido…” No shit, no one wants to have sex when they are dead ass tired and sore
9 years ago at 8:26 pmDan reaches his step limit for the day, stops moving.
9 years ago at 12:42 pmJust lift and run, no point in just lifting. Makes you look like a swollen Penis up top and chicken legs down below
9 years ago at 6:07 am