Add This To The List Of Contenders For “Whitest Fight Of All Time”

Dillon Cheverere9 years ago

Did you grow up around two brothers who fought a lot? Fights during driveway pickup games, or Madden. Stuff like that. One brother runs a play that ends in a touchdown so he keeps going back to the well time and time again. It’s a go route with Terrell Owens and he keeps getting behind the other brother’s secondary, so he’s going to TO all game long. It’s infuriating.

It resulted in shouting matches and thrown controllers and names like “fucking shithead” and “piece of fucking shit” being thrown around. They threaten violence to each other but it never actually comes to fists. All you get is blood curdling screams and name calling. They’re too soft to throw a real punch, even in fits of rage. Real punches change relationships. Plus they’re brothers. You don’t want to punch your brother.

This golf fight is a lot like two brothers fighting over Madden.

The guy in red is the softest dude I’ve ever seen. He retreats and gets into the fetal position when the big fella comes at him. Literally collapses to his back. Big dude rolls him over, just total control of him. No punches, though. Of course.

The subtle laughter from the guy behind the camera is so perfect. He knows this fight won’t get violent. He’s seen it too many times before. He knew zero punches would be thrown and it would end exactly how it ended — no physical harm and the worst thing happening is one guy calling the other a fucking shithead..