Western Michigan’s Lovable Bronco Mascot Is Now A Roided Out Douchebag Horse

Dent7 years ago

Western Michigan University was put on the map last season when P.J. Fleck and his “Row The Boat” mantra took the school on a 12-0 regular season run, capped off by a hard-fought Cotton Bowl loss to J-Bone’s beloved Wisconsin Badgers. Following the milestone year, Fleck promptly fled the university for a better opportunity at Minnesota. Students and alumni were clearly devastated by his decision.

Knowing that their fifteen minutes of relevance were in the rearview mirror, WMU administrators panicked. The absence of their fiery coach, and his equally magnetizing slogan left a major void. Students had to throw away all their RTB apparel, and while the team would have a new coach, no one could replace the Fleck-man. Realizing this fact, the school decided to do something to spice things up. Of all possible options, they decided the best idea to excite the student body would be to overhaul the look of their mascot, Buster Bronco — and people are livid about it.

So pissed that there is a petition floating around the university demanding that the beloved stallion be reverted back immediately.

From change.org:

Buster Bronco is an icon. A fun loving WMU goofball. At the sidelines of a football or basketball game, or out in the community, Buster is Kalamazoo’s favorite mascot. But Western Michigan University has changed him, “updated” him to be more lean and athletic. In the process, we’ve lost the very heart and soul of who Buster is. What is wrong with the Buster we’ve had? He’s classic and has a unique look for the university that’s been around for years.

Let’s bring the Buster we know and love back.

Fight on fight on for Buster!

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. The original Buster Bronco had an inviting vibe. He was overweight, with glazed over eyes like he had just taken a toke of something under the bleachers. All the kids loved running up to him for high-fives and photo ops. There was no fear. In fact, everyone loved him. He was approachable. He was ours.

But this new guy? He’s terrifying. Children are running away like they just saw Pennywise. He looks roided out of his goddamn mind and someone that screams with every bench rep. He’d probably go around and talk shit about how big of a pussy every other guy in the gym is before proceeding to slap a female trainer’s ass on his way out the door. The new had-a-few-too-many-sniffs-on-the-smelling-salt Buster is a dick. You can see it in his demon eyes. I don’t know this guy, and I don’t care to know him.

Furthermore, the petition is right, mascots aren’t supposed to look lean and athletic. Their whole existence is based off of the fact that they are supposed to be easy to make fun of. They need to have humorous qualities like being overweight, with some jacked up teeth or something. You know, dopey shit.

The person inside of the mascot costume is supposed to be some nerd who wasn’t cool enough to play the sport. Do we really want to empower him/her by putting them in an athletic getup, and making them feel adequate? Just doesn’t seem right.

I get that universities are always trying to find new ways to be fresh and new, and that’s fine. Change uniforms every game, fuck with your logo, install some weird colored turf, but never change the mascot. That shit should be untouchable. Let’s sign the petition, and help the people of WMU get Buster back. #NotMyBuster .

[via change.org]

Image via Youtube