Baker Mayfield’s New Girl Is An Absolute Rocket Ship

If I had just won the Heisman Trophy and was a projected first-round draft pick, I think I’d like to be single for the foreseeable future. That’s why if I’m an NFL GM, I’d have questions regarding Baker Mayfield’s decision making after news broke that he’s going steady with a new gal pal. Having said that, his new girlfriend is, um, pretty good looking.

Meet Emily Wilkinson, Baker Mayfield’s new rocket ship girlfriend.

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

A post shared by Emily Wilkinson (@ewilkinson) on

This girl is an incendiary bomb who would give me an ischemic stroke if she even looked in my general vicinity. But having said that, Baker, buddy, what’re you doing? Your stock has never been higher. The path has been lit by the previous greats. Johnny Football. Gronk. Vinny Chase. Don’t lock yourself down to one girl when your stock is peaking like early December Bitcoin prices. It’s irresponsible. You’ve been given this gift and you’re throwing it all away.

    1. StoryTeller

      The only thing you’ve ever had was your sister’s old panties to sniff while you jerk off in the back of your family’s one room shack

      8 years ago at 10:52 am
      1. jizzrag69v2

        Why don’t you wait until you lose your v card before talking shit to your master little guy

        8 years ago at 10:56 am
      2. StoryTeller

        You’re a master…….bater! HAHAHAHAHAHA the closest you’ve come to touching a tit is when your fat cousin leans across the table for more mashed potatoes and her arm fat rubs your arm and kinda feels like a soft titty. Then your dad uses your pre mature ejaculation for gravy on his potatoes while your mom is out fucking someone else, like me 😉

        8 years ago at 11:12 am
      3. jizzrag69v2

        Took the bait just like I knew you would. Now dance for the crowd my little monkey, the organ grinder is turning the crank…

        8 years ago at 11:28 am
      4. InternationalFratStudent

        You do realize people are baiting your bait account right? Nobody actually takes you seriously anymore, you’re just a means of entertainment because you try so hard

        8 years ago at 11:58 am
      5. jizzrag69v2

        And another loser joins the dance! The fact that you losers come here with the sole purpose of commenting on my threads proves that you are losers. Now keep dancing, little monkey!

        8 years ago at 12:00 pm
      6. thevaginatorv2

        You know what’s my favorite entertainment? Slammy your crack head mother under her hole is large enough for me to crawl inside of, which I do… now dance twerp

        8 years ago at 12:28 pm
      7. thevaginator

        Hey little man you ever figure out who was at Hakkasan on new years eve?

        8 years ago at 1:11 pm
      1. thevaginator

        Welcome to TFM champ. I run things around here. Stay out of my way and you’ll do just fine here. Fuck with me and you’ll end up dancing like a puppet, or just may get your ass beat.

        8 years ago at 10:30 pm
      2. jizzrag69v2

        And by “donnybrook” I assume you mean sticking one fist up your own ass and beating off with the other hand. Yeah I’m sure you’re always down for that

        8 years ago at 9:58 am
      3. jizzrag69v2

        Be at the owner’s suite at Lincoln Financial Stadium tomorrow at halftime. I’ll give your ass the kicking an idiot like you deserves. Pussy.

        8 years ago at 10:30 am
      4. BuschLattesFTW

        Give me an actual address of where you will be you pussy. We all know your broke self can’t even afford to watch the game let alone be in the stadium. I’ll gladly come punch a hole through your egg head Fratty mcfatfuck

        8 years ago at 12:01 pm
      5. thevaginator

        Ask punchythegarden, the fdr kid, or that ksig pussy what happens when you fuck with me. Now sit down before you get knocked the fuck out

        8 years ago at 11:11 am
  1. thevaginator

    I’d put it in her ass and cum on her face but those tits could use some work.

    8 years ago at 11:45 am
  2. BuschLattesFTW

    o/u how long before they get married
    O/u how long before she takes all his NFL money

    8 years ago at 12:11 pm
      1. thevaginatorv2

        What’s new? You’re the absolutely worst commenter on this site, absolute amateur

        8 years ago at 12:29 pm
  3. SharkWeekTFM

    What is y’all’s opinion on girls’ undercarriage? Prefer just maintained? Some kind of design? Scorched earth? Would you tolerate a horticulturist’s worst nightmare as long as you were getting laid?

    8 years ago at 6:02 pm
    1. jizzrag69v2

      I prefer a well-manicured lawn but these losers would take on The Swamp Thing if it meant losing their v cards

      8 years ago at 6:08 pm
      1. SharkWeekTFM

        Gonna have to agree. But then again all sharks (at least look) totally smooth and obviously no hair.

        If there is hair in food I pay for I send it back.

        8 years ago at 10:02 am
  4. David Allen Coe

    Breaking News: First Round Draft Pick and Heisman Winners girlfriend is hot

    8 years ago at 8:09 pm