GVSU Student Rifles Off Viral Tweets, Gets DM Asking Him To Participate In A Real-Life Cuckold Situation

Dent8 years ago

Social media is a weird thing in the sense that anyone can go viral really quickly. One day you’re just another everyday conspiracy theorist trying to prove that 9/11 was an inside job involving aliens, and the next thing you know you’re getting gassed up by thousands of likes from Russian bots. Anyone — literally anyone — who has an interesting thought that people can relate to (or exploit) can go viral. It’s basically if you took the American dream and put it online.

Unfortunately, that one viral moment is something that I have yet to capture. Not one thought that I have had since joining Twitter my sophomore year of high school has been relevant enough for thousands of people to care about it. Maybe someday, if I work hard enough and believe in the all-powerful internet gods, it will happen for me. But until then, I’ll keep plugging away in these online streets.

My lack of success in this department is especially frustrating when I have to sit back and watch others living my dream right before my eyes. For example, check out this guy that I came across yesterday while perusing the Twittersphere.

This was a genuinely funny tweet that actually made me laugh, so logically I threw a quick retweet at it. Good for him getting his. I then continued about my day until the same guy resurfaced on my feed via a different semi-viral tweet.

Again, I will not argue that it was a fire tweet, but damn he did it again? At this point, I decided to click on the profile for more info. And, much to my surprise, this Twitter king hails from the same school as I: Grand Valley State University, baby. In fact, I learned that this seemingly normal student has ridden the wave of no less than five uber-viral tweets in the last few weeks.

Okay, now I was starting to get suspicious. What kind of Twitter voodoo or above-my-head nerd shit was this kid pulling? Part of me was admittedly mad that someone I had never heard of was cucking me for social media clicks, while the other half was desperately trying to figure out his tricks. Obviously, I had to throw him a follow to keep tabs on the situation.

Fast forward to this morning when I came across this stranger once more.

Did this guy really just ask my soon-to-be best friend Blake (teach me your ways) for a real-life cuckold situation? I feel like you have to at least hear the guy out after he had the balls to ask the question. Call me a jerk, but I’ll gladly fuck another man’s girl without his permission let alone with it. I don’t care if it’s weird; your boy performs fine with an audience. Sell tickets for all I care.

Is this just more voodoo from Blake desperate to get clicks, or is there actually someone on campus who wants him to take their girl to Poundtown? I’m really hoping the latter, and I’m hoping even more so that Blake says yes because he can’t guarantee another opportunity like this will ever present itself to him again.

Blake, I have no idea if you’re legit or just hype. But if somehow you are for real, do it for the story, my dude. And — more importantly —
follow me back already..

Image via Wikimedia Commons