brain butt

Does Your Butt Have A Brain In It?

brain butt

From CBS Denver:

Researchers discovered that the neurons in the digestive system fire in synchronized blasts, which propel waste out of the body. This is the same way neurons in the brain fire as they send signals throughout the body.

Spencer and his team believe the same results will be found in other mammals including humans, even though the Australian study was conducted with mice,

“We can use this as a blueprint to understand how dysfunctional neurogenic motor patterns may arise along the colon,” Spencer said.

The professor noted that the brain in your rear is technically your “first brain” because scientists believe it actually evolved before the brain and central nervous system in mammals.

Yes, they’ve only found this in mice thus far. However, the evidence is clear and the writing is on the wall: ass brains exist, and they give a whole new meeting to “get your head out of your ass.” We as a species shouldn’t be ashamed to have our heads up our asses; it gives us the chance to harness the raw power of our intelligence. This is the next step in our evolution.

I knew there was a reason everybody was always calling me a smart ass all these years. It was never an insult; it was them seeing my true potential. Them encouraging me to have the smartest smart ass this world has ever seen.

Neurons in the digestive system are firing in synchronized “blasts” to expel waste — this is all a fancy way of describing a fart, right? I’m no science man, but I feel like it has to be. My hypothesis is that the faster the neurons fire, the more violent the flatulence. So it would follow logically that loud farts = smart farts, or that greater odor = higher knowledge, right? There’s gotta be an equation for this somewhere.

[via CBS Denver]

Image via Shutterstock (altered)

  1. AndrewsMomsAss

    If my ass had a brain I’d be the smartest person on Match.com! Ha ha I’m going to put that on Facebook!

    6 years ago at 12:02 pm
  2. BIowjob420

    I have a huge turd in my Depends and I’m pretty sure it’s doing all the thinking.

    6 years ago at 3:43 pm
    1. BIowjob420

      Sometimes I cut a hole in my Depends and let the shit drain out. Walking down the sidewalk leaving a trail of stinking shit behind you is a great way to attract women here at FSU.

      6 years ago at 6:18 pm
  3. Too.Old.For.This.Shit

    Ooooh, I thought vaginator just couldn’t understand the course material when he kept saying he got “mind fucked” after all of his classes.

    6 years ago at 6:37 pm
    1. thevaginator

      You wanna get your ass beat kid? Because that’s what’s happening if you keep running your mouth

      6 years ago at 9:40 pm
  4. 21Cleavage

    I saw the title and got scared that Wally was back, but I was pleasantly surprised by this article

    6 years ago at 9:31 pm
  5. ShowMeYourButtStuff

    If butts have brains then the stripper I had sex with last semester probably has Alzheimer’s now.

    6 years ago at 9:44 pm
  6. DubyasLeftNut

    So getting spanked/paddled gives your 1st brain a concussion? So those soft SJW parents might’ve been onto something all along. Fuck em

    6 years ago at 5:45 am