The “Other” Chapter

Every fraternity worth belonging to has chapters in nearly every state. With this large of a geographic spread, a difference in membership from chapter to chapter is expected. While this difference in membership assures that some of your “F or NF” standards might be challenged, some houses just push it too damn far. I’m talking about the black sheep. Those chapters whose brothers you see on Fail Friday wearing embroidered hoodies and cargo shorts while swimming in a sea of equally embarrassing whales disguised as sorostitutes.

I know shit gets fuzzy at the end of hell week but those oaths of eternal brotherhood you took at the end of hell week are supposed to apply to the guys in all the “other” chapters. Yes, you are forever bound to that doucher with the Polo horse tattoo.

Fortunately you can avoid these guys for most of your fraternal experience. They are unlikely to attend a school relevant enough to warrant a road trip and equally as unlikely to be visiting the same frat destination as you. But, at some point in your fraternal career you are bound to run into them. National conventions are notoriously thick with members from “other” chapters. Mandatory attendance assures that a sampling of brothers from the bottom rungs of your national organization will be in attendance. The dress code at the actual convention might make identifying the “other” chapter difficult but the sneakers and blazer look is probably a dead give away.

Now most of you will not attend a national conference but you are not safe from the random visitor. You know who I’m talking about. Your president got a call from so and so from the Rho Nu chapter at Who Gives a Fuck State and they’re going to be in town tonight. Common sense tells you that their irrelevant university located conspicuously north of the Mason-Dixon line harbors an unfortunate breed of fraternity man. If you reject your instincts and extend an invitation in the name of brotherhood you are sure to be disappointed. The brothers from the “other” chapter will probably resemble the last five kids you kicked out of rush and possess comparable skills. If curiosity gets the better of you and you decide to ask about their chapter, prepare for the shame. Best case scenario, their from somewhere with a tiny greek system. Worst case they have 14 guys, no pledgeship, and refer to three connecting apartments as the “fratcastle.”

Thankfully, these instances will be few and far between, allowing us to live our lives without the constant thoughts of all these assholes wearing our letters.

If you have no idea what the fuck I’m talking about then you’re in the “other” chapter.

    1. Sig Fratling

      And y’all are terrible brothers. I pains me to call you my brothers. I would not shake your hands.

      13 years ago at 9:55 pm
    2. FrattinSince1855

      That picture makes me cringe… might be the worst chapter of Sigma Chi but I’m willing to bet it’s the best chapter on that campus. Always and forever proud, IHSV.

      13 years ago at 11:20 pm
    3. Jon M Fratsman

      Never said I wasn’t proud. They’re my brothers, too, though their chapter could use some serious work. Every family has its black sheep. In Hoc, brothers.

      13 years ago at 11:39 pm
  1. SPEtraditional

    Let’s just be honest, the SigEp picture fits about 75% of our chapters. For our fraternity it’s the “other” chapter that still hazes and refuses that Balanced Man shit.

    13 years ago at 4:45 pm
    1. Fratrick Swayze 1856

      Not a fan of sig ep at all, but I can respect any chapter that says hell no to all that pussy balanced man horse shit.

      13 years ago at 5:13 pm
    2. Stay Hammered

      I can’t speak for other chapters but we’re only Balanced Man because we’re forced to be, we still haze and put the new guys through hell like any traditional chapter would.

      13 years ago at 7:08 pm
    3. FRATomic_B0mb

      It takes a lot to get through the bmp. Energy that would have gone into hazing instead goes into activities that build values that last a lifetime. New members go through it all together, with direction and mentoring from older members, building brotherhood productively. And we still scare the shit out of the new members through “bonding activities” that don’t necessarily qualify as hazing. It reinforces a founding principle, that ‘this fraternity will be different.” They may hate us for not hazing but they can never ignore us for the quality of our members. Those goofy fucks in the picture they would never be accepted into our chapter tho.

      13 years ago at 7:33 pm
    4. SouthernByGodsGrace

      FratomicBomb, if that was sarcasm then it’s the funniest shit I’ve ever read.

      If you are being serious then please get off this site and don’t claim to be anything fraternal.

      Guys like you are the epitome of the “Participation Trophy.” Take your hoodies, skinny jeans, and flatbilled hats out of here.

      The SigEp balanced man chapter at the school I attend changed their colors to the colors of a high school that most of them went to. Enough said. Nothing could be so disrespectful.

      13 years ago at 8:08 pm
    5. BidNightNegSquad

      I’m with SPE. When I rushed I had no idea that 3 out of every 4 SigEp chapters would suck balls nationally. Just because my chapter was balanced man (we had to be because we just got our charter back) doesn’t mean we didn’t haze, I am proof of that. I still had to go through the same shit everyone else did. In a way it was worse because we still had to go through that until the next pledge class came in for initiation 3 weeks into spring semester. Yes, BM is a backwards-ass way to do things. A chapter can either adapt and make the best of it, or – as displayed in the picture above – regress into puss-dom.

      13 years ago at 8:26 am
    6. TheEpsilonSince1901

      Amen brother..that 75% of sig ep that is balanced man are about as useful as the ass hair the pledges smoked..they have shown up to our house, scared our girls away, cant handle their alcohol, and practically bow down to you like the no ball pussy losers they know they are.

      13 years ago at 12:54 am
    1. SPEtraditional

      Please correct me, I did not see the mistake but I can show you that the reply button is other there >

      13 years ago at 5:13 pm
    2. futureleader14

      ^ and ^^^, take a lap around the world. I was referring to the actual column, hence the lack of need for the reply button.

      13 years ago at 8:16 pm
    1. Jon M Fratsman

      ….holy fuck. while I normally have nothing good to say about Pike, ever, that house is damned impressive.

      13 years ago at 7:21 pm
    2. fumafounder

      Like I said, “every other” congrats on 50% doing it right. Way to aim for the middle, dad.

      13 years ago at 8:55 pm
    1. murica1776

      What a douche. I don’t know what’s gayer your original post or the fact that you agreed to take a lap. i hope you get blackballed, because you’re obviously a pledge.

      13 years ago at 2:09 am
  2. BROjaysimpson1

    This reminds me of another column just like this.
    But I still laughed.
    Well played sir.

    13 years ago at 8:22 pm