30 Things Fraternity Guys Say When They’re Trying to Get Laid
1. “We could just go back to my place and watch a movie.”
2. “Hey, let me buy you a drink.”
3. “I’ll call us a pledge ride home.”
4. “Anything you want me to help with for that 21st birthday sign?”
5. “Oh, it was you who put ‘Call Me Maybe’ on the jukebox? What a great song.”
6. “Why yes, I would love to meet your little.”
7. (via text message) “what are you up to tonight?”
8. “Upside-down Margarita shots, anyone?”
9. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see where your sisters went. Maybe we could look for them at my place?”
10. “I’m making Jell-o shots for the party tonight.”
11. “Your Communications classes sound really difficult.”
12. “How much will I owe you for this again?”
13. “Wow, there are girls in your sorority that you don’t like? Tell me all about them.”
14. “Hey man, how old is your little sister again?”
15. “We just got a puppy, you should come over and see!”
16. “My house isn’t too far from here…”
17. (via text message) “come over.”
18. “Wanna be my date for Formal?”
19. “Your mom seems like an amazing woman.”
20. “Sorry to hear that your boyfriend is out of town.”
21. “I promise I won’t tell anyone about this.”
22. “I’m a Senior, but I’m going to Law School next Fall.”
23. “You ready for round 2?”
24. (via text message) “heyy whatf are yuo uop to?”
25. “We’re having a huge post-party at the house after this, you should come.”
26. “I’ve got some ‘party favors’ back at my place if you’re trying to get down.”
27. “That Instagram filter makes your eyes look gorgeous.”
28. “You should bring your new pledge class over tonight!”
29. “I know you’re only a Freshman but you seem really mature for your age.”
30. “I love you too.”
First! Figure It Out bitches
13 years ago at 5:15 pmSecond!
13 years ago at 5:16 pmThird!
13 years ago at 5:17 pmYou can all go fuck yourselves.
13 years ago at 5:21 pmAll of you can can go enjoy yourselves in a peeway with each other.
13 years ago at 5:22 pm^^, ^^^, ^^^^ And now we have a roadmap to Fratdusky’s path of destruction.
13 years ago at 5:22 pm^^beat me too it.. laps taken
13 years ago at 5:22 pmAaaaaaaand lacin’ em.
13 years ago at 5:23 pm^ Couldn’t agree more.
13 years ago at 7:55 amI’ll literally say anything as long as it leads to pink.
13 years ago at 5:16 pm^
13 years ago at 5:19 pmthis^
13 years ago at 5:19 pm^^^this guy gets it
13 years ago at 5:27 pmall of this ^
13 years ago at 6:04 pm^http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0
13 years ago at 6:26 pm^ tool
13 years ago at 6:52 pmNo shame in saying anything. As long as it leads there in the end.
13 years ago at 6:56 pm^
Except the last one.. NF.
13 years ago at 2:52 amNo whiskey, No Sperrys, No boats, NF.
13 years ago at 5:18 pmNo shoes, No shirt, Free shots?
13 years ago at 5:19 pmi read to the jingle of: lions and tigers and bears oh my
13 years ago at 5:31 pm^ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0
13 years ago at 6:22 pm“I’m pledging TKE!”
Gets ’em everytime.
13 years ago at 5:19 pmI used to say that to girls even when I was pledging Sigma Nu
13 years ago at 5:23 pm^Ok you sound like a dog shit disgrace to Sigma Nu and you’re a complete trolling failure. Take a step back and immediately kill youself
13 years ago at 5:46 pmOld Virginia, don’t feed the trolls.
13 years ago at 7:17 pm^
13 years ago at 9:33 pmI say “I like to troll the TFM comment boards” and within seconds they are totally naked, I take them back to my basement and tie them up where I repeatedly beat them and rape them. Then I grab my gun and shoot some conservative geeds in the face.
13 years ago at 10:34 pmwhat is a conservative geed?
13 years ago at 12:17 am^^http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMEe7JqBgvg
13 years ago at 12:54 amForming a coherent sentence is a bit of a struggle for the average Tau Kappa Epsilon, among other things.
13 years ago at 7:22 am^among is a preposition, dawg
13 years ago at 12:19 pm^^^^ an oxymoron
13 years ago at 5:09 pm^^^ I’d give you props if you even said Tau right, which i bet you don’t. nice try though
13 years ago at 11:38 pmSaying you are a pledge gets you no pussy, so laps for lying. TKE gets nothing except lower tier geeds
13 years ago at 7:26 pmThis is one of the worst things TFM has posted.
13 years ago at 5:19 pm^ I’ve said maybe two of these. Notice it’s titled “trying” to get laid. Out of material, try-hard?
13 years ago at 6:35 pmI just don’t get why they’re trying to give away our tactics…it seems weird.
13 years ago at 6:58 pm^this
13 years ago at 8:01 pmDoes this smell like chloroform?
13 years ago at 5:21 pm^ This
13 years ago at 5:24 pm^^Some of these other guys, but this guy.
13 years ago at 8:02 pmhahaha
13 years ago at 8:59 pmDo you like dragons? Cuz I’m gonna be draggin deese nuts over your face.
13 years ago at 5:11 pm^ I hate you
13 years ago at 2:57 pmWanna go to some shots back at my place?
13 years ago at 5:22 pmtake some*
13 years ago at 5:22 pmcool post bro
13 years ago at 5:53 pmWant to see my golf clubs?
13 years ago at 6:25 pmWant to see my dick?
13 years ago at 7:17 pmWant to see my new baseball bat?
13 years ago at 11:40 pmWant to see my sex dungeon?
13 years ago at 7:23 am“Hey the Notebook is my favorite movie too! Wanna go watch it back in my room?”
you bastard fraternity men….
13 years ago at 11:48 amWant to play with skin flute ?
13 years ago at 2:39 pmAGD ^ Alpha Graba Donut
13 years ago at 6:48 pmFucking reply button
13 years ago at 6:48 pm“Want to come see my new sheets?”
13 years ago at 12:54 pmHave you seen my fish tank?
10 years ago at 1:18 pmShots on shots on shots!
10 years ago at 2:51 pm#24…..Guilty.
13 years ago at 5:22 pm#24, only with worse spelling.
13 years ago at 6:13 pm^Good laugh in the morning.
13 years ago at 8:40 pmBeen there, done that, and even passed out before she got there. Hilarious string of texts to wake up to, you guys.
13 years ago at 9:06 pm^I enjoyed your reference, you guys.
13 years ago at 10:32 amYeah I can totally get you a job at TFM
13 years ago at 5:24 pmSo thats how Dorn got his job…
13 years ago at 5:26 pmWhat’s a job?
13 years ago at 5:27 pmJobs are for immigrants.
13 years ago at 6:57 pmWait really? Oh my gosh that would be totally awesome, where do I apply?
13 years ago at 11:44 amWell, that’s a cock block of a column if I do say so myself.
13 years ago at 5:26 pmagreed. now we have to come up with new lies to feed them.. tour of the house will always prevail
13 years ago at 6:24 pmegh. in a way.. but freshman girls still will be clueless. plus.. We already know anyways.. hahaha.
13 years ago at 10:25 am