Bad Commenter Of The Week: May 5

Jared Borislow8 years ago

Welcome to “Bad Commenter Of The Week,” a weekly series here on TFM wherein I will roast a TFM commenter whom I deem roastworthy for one reason or another — or maybe for no reason at all. Lucky for me, I get to handpick my target. Maybe you’ll agree with my selection, maybe you won’t, maybe it’ll be you. Only time will tell, and I have it on high authority that time’s lips are sealed. Looks like you’ll just have to keep tuning in if you want to see who each week’s massive idiot target is.

Unlike in our series Commenter Of The Week, I will not be interviewing the commenter I select because, quite frankly, they don’t deserve that courtesy. If you happen to be the target of my current or future ire, feel free to respond in the comment section, dumbass.

Let me take you on a journey.

Earlier this week, I wrote up the story of UF kicker Eddy Piñeiro booting an 81-yard field goal like it was nothing. When I went to check the comment section of said article, I noticed a most peculiar remark.

Normally I’d respect an act of such shamelessness and reward him with a little clickaroo on the “^This” button. But then I went, “Oh wait, I have to pick a Bad Commenter of the Week. Guess it’ll be this dude” because I can pick whoever I want for no reason at all to hold that completely arbitrary and subjective title (Corn1845 dodged a bullet this week; check out the comment section of last week’s edition to see why).

So introducing this week’s Bad Commenter of the Week, TheSro!

“Ha! Haha! I have owned him!!! I have owned this stranger!!!” I was on cloud nine. My actions even resulted in a couple angry emails from TheSro, who was not happy that I’d just ruined his tally of fake internet points. This obviously made my efforts that much more worth it in my own eyes.

But then I had a change of heart after seeing TheSro’s response on the site.

“Thanks”

Damn.

TheSro just accepted his fate. Just like that. I sentenced him to the gallows, and he, resigned to internet death, walked on over there, put the rope around his own neck, and kicked the chair. TheSro taught me a lot about what it means to live and, more importantly, what it means to die. I watched as the five stages of grief played out before my very eyes, and it was a very humbling experience. We’re all just humans, trying to get by.

I knew what I had to do.

Important note: When I upvoted “Thanks,” I inversely matched the upvote count to that of his original comment. That’s on you guys for making this whole experience a net negative for TheSro.

I’m a benevolent Internet Man. Remember that.

Regardless, your comment was bad and you should feel bad, TheSro. You’re a massive idiot and you deserve all the shame that comes your way..

Image via Shutterstock