Blowjobs Cure Pregnancy Morning Sickness, Awesome Scientists Claim

I always figured that if I had decided to be an idiot and become a scientist, I would have blown (pun intended) all of my grant money on trying to convince society that women need to give more head as a medical necessity. Well, it’s a good thing I didn’t, because some dude named Gordy already does that shit:

According to Gordon Gallup, a psychologist at SUNY-Albany, the best way to cure morning sickness during pregnancy is sperm. But not just any sperm, it should be the sperm of the person who got you pregnant.

This all might indeed be scientific fact, but you have to think that my boy Gordo was just like, “Okay, pregnant women give their husbands a lot of hell, right? How do we fucking fix that?” Also, note that it only works with the guy who knocked her up. Which means, not only does giving your husband dome make you feel better, if you suck anyone else’s dick…you’re gonna barf.

I love science.

  1. ThinkThereforeFRAT

    Very interesting. Think easily outweighs the idea that blowies can lead to a better chance for throat cancer.

    12 years ago at 1:42 pm
  2. Tallapoosa Snu

    It all seems like a great idea until you take just a little bit too long and the morning sickness kicks in before the sperm is “ingested”. Unless you’re into that kind of shit.

    12 years ago at 1:47 pm
  3. F Scott Fratsgerald

    Sterling Cooper is alive? I thought he drowned in a tragic bukkake accident

    12 years ago at 2:19 pm
    1. Ron Washington

      What the fuck Sterling? Guy comes outta nowhere. Where have you been hiding?

      12 years ago at 2:14 am
  4. GotEm

    If you just gave a blowjob in the first place, you wouldn’t be having to do with morning sickness at all.

    12 years ago at 2:50 pm
  5. 1ironking

    “I always figured that if I had decided to be an idiot and become a scientist,…”

    So basically “I lack the intelligence to pursue a difficult major requiring real intelligence that would result in a job that I’m completely incapable of holding.”

    Sucks to be stupid.

    12 years ago at 11:54 am