Breaking Down Terrible Rush T-Shirt Designs
Rush shirts and logos cover the spectrum from good all the way to cringe inducing. Today, I’m going to highlight some of the worst. These designs are Fail Friday worthy, and I hope all of these chapters netted exactly zero pledges. If you have any other gems, share them in the comments. Now, on to the shaming.
The Terrible Brand Rip-Off Rush Shirt
Fishing? What does fishing have to do with rushing a fraternity? Are you a fraternity or a Bass Pro Shop? If you’re the latter, do you have any deals on hunting shotguns this week? This brand abuse doesn’t make people think of you, it makes them think of the brand.
Oh no. Fuck you for reminding me of that goddamn Dane Cook sketch. It wasn’t funny in 2005, and it’s not funny now.
Other than the terrible design choice, it’s a great reason for people to start referring to your chapter as “Pikey” at your school. If you read that previous sentence and thought that sounded like a good idea, you should never be allowed near the rush shirt design process.
Terrible Graphic Tee Designs
Fight club shirts have never been original, and the idea of using it to suggest people join an organization that embodies some of the things Fight Club was railing against, and eventually blew up, is a special kind of irony.
Shitty graphic tee design? Check. Damaged/faded lettering? Check. Inability to attract positive attention from literally anyone? Big check.
This is the perfect rush shirt/banner for the fraternity that considers “sacrificing a pledge to the Old Gods in the house basement” a valid pledge event. This one would work really well for any chapter with Cthulhu on their crest.
Alpha Sig, 2002 called and it wants its internet meme back. Seriously, The Cheat? Let’s set aside the fact that it’s a Homestar Runner rush shirt for a moment, and just focus on the idea that you took something that hasn’t been culturally relevant for years and made it a rush shirt, which you are then trying to use to attract pledges. Strongbad disapproves.
The Try-Hard And Ultra Offensive Shirt
SO BADASS BROS! Thanks for that. Were you all too busy sexually assaulting the entire community to make a better shirt? Bonus points for using a picture from fucking sunscreen canisters of a girl who is a maximum of 8 years old. Pledging this chapter gets you your own windowless, white van with a “Free Candy” sign after initiation.
It doesn’t even stay with the “Keep calm…” meme it references, but worst of all, truly unforgivably, it puts a dollar sign in the word fratstar. I hope the try-hard that put this one together was hanged by his Sperrys until dead for crimes against the Greek community.
Haha OMG YOU’RE JEWISH! We get it. Jewish jokes are a lot like poop jokes. Simply pointing out that you’re Jewish, just like simply talking about pooping, isn’t funny. There has to be a context, some sort of theme or good reason. You’re not Larry David, so pack it up and go home. Also, I don’t even get their strategy. They’re a Jewish fraternity, isn’t the discouragement of dreideling counter-productive? Wouldn’t dreidel suck less while drunk? So many questions, so few answers.
Now that you’ve seen what the bad and the ugly look like, please, never make shirts like these. For all of our sakes, just don’t. Also, if I see another “most interesting man” shirt, I’m going to pistol whip someone. Be original and do something that stands out and has some relation to your chapter/organization. Make it catchy, but not corny, and you’ll be good.
Hold on I’m trying to think of a clever way to insult Dorn’s mother.
12 years ago at 2:03 pmSorry, but both of Dorn’s Dads are gay.
12 years ago at 4:48 pm^ This
12 years ago at 1:26 amI laughed at “Tighter than your little sister”
12 years ago at 2:05 pmThese are fucking awful. Although I am a fan of the offensive ones.
12 years ago at 2:06 pmUsing the phrase “cunt punt” in your rush shirt. TFTC
12 years ago at 2:09 pmTDGM
12 years ago at 9:39 pmAEPi had one that said “FRAT” but the A was the jewish star. Voted worst rush shirt of the year at our school.
12 years ago at 2:11 pm“Also, if I see another ‘most interesting man’ shirt, I’m going to pistol whip someone.” I like the Super Troopers reference.
12 years ago at 2:20 pmWhere did these come from? Sauce, please.
12 years ago at 2:21 pmThere really should have been a chaser at the end of this column.
12 years ago at 2:23 pm“Rush Pike. We did it.” is quite possibly the worst one. It made me cringe big time.
12 years ago at 2:25 pmPretty sure the TKE one is the worst.
12 years ago at 4:55 pmI want to impregnate Rebecca Martinson while she’s dressed as a dominatrix. Oh, and these shirts blow.
12 years ago at 2:32 pm