College Student Starts Condom Ambulance Service, Provides Emergency Condoms To Students

Sexually-active, yet unprepared, students at The College of New Jersey now have a pregnancy-and-sexually-transmitted-disease safety net to fall into during those certain heated moments of arousal. Thanks to fellow student Kyle McCabe, who we’ll introduce you to momentarily, an emergency rubber is just a few mouse clicks and several minutes away. McCabe started his company, CondAm, to hopefully encourage more safe sex on campus, but don’t make him out to be a saint quite yet — he does turn a small profit.

TCNJ students in need of prompt prophylactics can contact McCabe via his website, and he promises to deliver the good within minutes.

A single condom costs $3; a 10-pack costs $15.

Hell of a bargain there, McCabe. Shelling out three bones when a willing participant is horned up enough to accept you is the kind of deal anyone can get behind.

Calls at 2 or 3 AM are rough, McCabe admits — especially if he’s with his own girlfriend. “But I know if I get a call there’s kids in need,” he says, “I’m happy to do it.”

Whoa there, time out. I’m throwing the challenge flag on this one. Review the tape, because I’m willing to place a small wager that says this kid is as single as Oscar Pistorius is on this Valentine’s Day. “Oh come on, Dorn. Don’t be a dick. This guy’s doing good work up there in Jersey.” I don’t dispute that, but, well, let’s roll the tape and you’ll see what I’m talking about.

Meet Kyle McCabe:

Nerd City.

But what a trooper, man. An entrepreneurial good samaritan. Yeah, so the guy is a little socially awkward, but he’s providing an invaluable service to his peers, and at a pretty reasonable price.

If the awesome, very apparent irony here hasn’t already smacked you across your stupid face, I’ll point it out for you. The fella who sits around and waits for his condom-less schoolmates to get the fornication green light — and runs around campus delivering them safe sex prophylactics wearing a fucking bicycle helmet with a blue, spinning, attention-grabbing emergency light on top of it — is probably the only guy on campus not getting laid. My favorite jokes are the ones that write themselves, and this safe-sex-nerd-hero is the Ernest Hemingway of his university.

One more thing: Ryan Quindlen isn’t getting laid either.

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[via Gawker]

Image via AP

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  1. Tommy Gufano

    I bet that this fucking dweeb pokes holes in every condom to get back at the kids who are actually having sex.

    12 years ago at 4:59 pm
  2. MOMOgotMojo

    No way this kid has a girl. Also, i had sex on that campus and thought i was going to get hepatitis. That being said, there are a few up and coming porn stars there. “Dare Dorm”

    12 years ago at 5:11 pm
    1. Tallapoosa Snu

      Oh shit we got a TFM offshoot. Dorn sitting in his office chair talking to coeds… “so you want to work for TFM?… Here, put this in your mouth real quick.”

      12 years ago at 11:11 am
  3. VineyardVine

    Two things I don’t fuck with: New Jersey and Chris Christie, that guy is one prime rib away from a heart attack.

    12 years ago at 6:11 pm
  4. Tallapoosa Snu

    Am I the only person who noticed that girls name is “Shady Waxman”… What terrible parents. I call daddy issues on that condom recipient.

    12 years ago at 11:10 am
  5. Hannibro Lecter

    everyone go on his website and order like all the condoms and say youre paying in cash fuck this guy

    12 years ago at 11:56 am
    1. Hannibro Lecter

      and make sure its not discrete so that fuckface is running around with that flashing helmet like a dipshit

      12 years ago at 11:58 am
  6. fratelli brothers

    if dudes were smart, they would just follow that blue light to whore island…that way they know who to buy drinks for

    12 years ago at 1:47 pm