Demon Fish With An Appetite For Testicles Has Been Discovered Off The Coast Of Florida

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Scared of the open water? Sucks for you, because there is now a lot more to worry about during your trip to the beaches along the Gulf Coast. Forget dehydration, sunburns, sharks, and STDs. Your real enemy is a fish with a reputation for targeting men’s testicles that was recently caught off of the Florida coast.

This terrifying little detail that gives us a picture of what lurks in the unknown waters was brought to our attention by a man named Tom Rigby, who caught the fish near Sarasota, Fla.

From MySuncoast:

About a month ago, Rigby was fishing Phillippi Creek with a shrimp and was wide awake when his line took off.

“I had the drag set pretty tight, and it’s running with it. My first thought was a jack because they fight like crazy.”

After a long fight, he brought the fish aboard the boat. “I got out my fish ID chart and go through all of the species. I can’t see anything that looks like the species.”

He sent his picture of the fish to Mote Marine. They quickly identify it as a pacu, a freshwater species native to South America — and related to the piranha.

“I’m looking at all of the teeth, saying this thing can do some serious damage to another fish or something.”

If you were nervous about wading just waist-deep into the water before, your fears were just sent through the fucking roof. I cannot judge you for that.

As if this discovery could possibly be any more nerve-racking, the fisherman released the little nut muncher after taking a photo.

It is believed that the fish was released from someone’s fish tank after it outgrew its habitat, but that does nothing to prove that there aren’t thousands of those little fuckers swimming around, seeking some clappers to gnaw on.

The Animal Planet show “River Monsters” has also done a segment on this fish, though it was filmed far from the Floridian coast.

Fuck that.

[via MySuncoast]

Image via YouTube

  1. Frat IV

    And I have the luxury of reading this article from my house by the beach in, you guessed it, Sarasota, Florida

    10 years ago at 6:31 pm
      1. Frat IV

        wasnt trying to sound frat. youd be annoyed too if you found out these ball biters were where you live

        10 years ago at 6:17 pm
  2. Hoosier Fratter

    No where does it state how the fish got a reputation for family jewels. Making shit up. TFM?

    10 years ago at 10:56 pm
    1. Being True

      Thats because it is a hoax, this floats around the net every once and a while. Litterally drunk fishermen made this up to scare people.

      10 years ago at 7:16 pm
  3. Andy_Dufresne

    Jeremy Wade the river monsters guy making a living by traveling around the world and netting fish that are literally things of legend. TFM.

    10 years ago at 10:26 am
  4. Being True

    Not this internet hoax again. This is an urban legend spread around again, dumbass.

    10 years ago at 7:14 pm