The 10 Frattest Sports Movie Characters
Every penis-wielding son of a bitch in our great nation appreciates when sports and American cinema are combined. Classic movies like “The Natural,” “Hoosiers” and “The Sandlot” strike emotionally down in the deepest parts of our loins, and iconic scenes from these timeless flicks make our bollocks tingle. Today we’ll examine the character traits of the most respected characters from all-time great sports movies, and analyze their inspirational attributes.
Roy McAvoy
Roy McAvoy is a PGA caliber talent with no shot at earning his card. He’s held back by his beer drinking, tail-chasing and mental instability. Roy is also a short-tempered hot head with gambling problems.
Guy’s FaF, though. He committed a devastating post-grad TFM while caddying for PGA great, David Simms. After suggesting Simms hit the 3-wood and carry the water on the short par 5 16th, Simms refused and shaped a smooth 7-iron in perfect approach position. After Simms’ partner, Craig Stadler, proposed a bet to “Tin Cup” that he couldn’t make the shot, he accepted, costing him his job. McAvoy fucking stuck it, though.
Oh yeah, and he also stole Simms’ girlfriend and gave her the business in his Winnebago.
Barry badrinath and Land Phil
13 years ago at 4:37 pm^this guy
13 years ago at 7:44 pm“Rolling joints” NF
13 years ago at 4:39 pmrailing lines. FaF
13 years ago at 7:18 pmsunshine? thats a baaaaad white boy
13 years ago at 4:44 pmhe was a hippy if youre talking about remember the titans
13 years ago at 4:54 pmSunshine NF he made out with a dude
13 years ago at 11:11 pmMaking out with dudes NF
13 years ago at 11:15 pm^Thanks for the clarification.
13 years ago at 12:22 am^ I do what I can.
13 years ago at 12:13 pmRocky Balboa is definitely NF… If that story were retold today he would be rocking affliction/tapout and fighting MMA.
13 years ago at 4:45 pmThat’s why it was first told in 1976. Rocky FaF.
13 years ago at 4:51 pmYou missed my point… Rocky was the geed of the 70’s.
13 years ago at 6:16 pmRocky winning one for America in the USSR during the height of the Cold War. FaF
13 years ago at 9:05 pmRocky making millions in endorsements. FaF.
13 years ago at 10:51 pmRocky getting commie bastards to cheer his name at the end of Rocky IV. FaF.
Rocky coming up from nothing and becoming an American legend. I’m pretty sure the American dream is FaF.
13 years ago at 2:03 pm“Get him a bodybag, yeah!”
13 years ago at 4:48 pm^this
13 years ago at 12:42 amNah…Gordon Bombay is actually number one.
13 years ago at 4:49 pmTruth^
13 years ago at 10:49 pmWhere the hell is Jimmy Dugan?
13 years ago at 4:54 pmYes. Jimmy fuckin Dugan.
13 years ago at 10:00 pm^Badass name. Go Braves.
13 years ago at 10:00 pmDid anyone ever tell you that you look like a penis with that little hat on?
13 years ago at 1:07 amWhere’s Brikma?
13 years ago at 4:55 pmhe’s still locked up in that cage in the clubhouse while the cubs win the pennant.
13 years ago at 6:39 pmSmalls > Squints. And how can you leave out Ty Webb, Larry Kroger, Doug Neidermeyer, Eric Stratton or basically anyone from Animal House?
13 years ago at 4:57 pmWhat sport did they play in Animal house?
13 years ago at 5:01 pm^^Animal House isn’t a sports movie, chief.
13 years ago at 5:02 pm^ You’re doing it wrong then
13 years ago at 5:04 pmAdam Banks? The Cake Eater? Step your game up Dorn
13 years ago at 5:01 pm^^ Kid plays driveway hockey in a polo, he rocks the best equipment and every kid on his miserable team hates him because he’s rich.
What about Jim Craig? He dominated the Soviets.
13 years ago at 5:27 pm^^Fucking this.
13 years ago at 6:12 pmExactly, WHERE WAS BANKS?!
13 years ago at 7:52 pmI’m right here boys. In all honesty, my dad should be included too. He cut a deal with the peewee hockey league and the owner of a law firm to keep me on the Hawks.
13 years ago at 6:42 pm