FAIL FRIDAY: Body Shots Off Bros
Ten real submissions, nineteen photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.
I submit 10 TFM’s a day because I have to get one posted or my life is over. TFM.
-Texas
Fuck you, pledge.
Fingering your slampiece solely for the forearm workout. TFM.
-New York
It’s not sexual? Just a little forearm power sesh? Proceed.
Soaking your golf balls in blood and semen. TFM.
-South Carolina
Why? I’m seriously curious. What does this accomplish?
Getting “milk my neighbor’s pregnant labrador retriever” drunk. It’s a TFM.
–DeVry University
We’ve all been there.
Drinking a box of wine and gently masturbating yourself to sleep. TFM.
-South Carolina
Lose the box. Slap the bag. Perfect Saturday night.
Getting more squirrel than an oak tree. TFM.
–Texas
If he specified that it was a smooth, recently shaven squirrel this would’ve made the TFM wall.
Being able to hold a complete logistical conversation with another brother, in total darkness, without using any words. TFM.
-Florida
Perfect tagline for the DVD cover of the gay frat porn I’m producing.
My son will know the Greek alphabet long before the English one. TFM.
-Kentucky
Brace yourself for some incredibly disappointing report card results.
Saying “I’m thinkin’ Arby’s” before eating out the slam. TFM.
–Texas
You’re thinking about this?
Money can’t be me love, but it can buy me several Asian prostitutes and a cleanup man to dispose of the bodies.
–Arkansas
Yeah, that just happened. On to the photos…
It’s all fun and games until someone checks his pulse.
From the right: full suit, jacket, blazer, pledge t-shirt and cargos, laughter.
Turns out, the powerpoint is incredibly ineffective with crutches.
Sometimes trying to “chug photobomb” people on your 21st birthday doesn’t work out.
20” inseams and sideways couches. NF.
“Get a pic of me and my Nordstrom’s bags, brosephina.”
Body shots off bros in the year 2061. TFM.
This is a stripper in what I assume is the dressing room of a low-dollar tittie bar.
Two bros with chiseled abs and tribal tats Instagram-ing their 300-inspired Halloween costumes.
Dufus in white flip-flops wins lime green Shamu at carnival.
This was posted on Facebook with the caption: “Frat cat chillin’ in the frocket.”
For the love of God, someone get the guy on the far left with the C-cups a fucking bra.
That awkward moment when the guy in the gorilla suit rapes the guy in the banana suit.
Cross-dressing and dancing on the roof of your car like it’s the end of the world. It’s a TFM.
Holy shit, it’s Sig Ep Raiden.
When you can’t afford a hot tub, innovation is necessary.
Sigma Chi Rises:
This is, without a doubt, one of the most uncomfortably terrible and hilarious things I’ve ever seen in my life.
TKE does an unbelievable job of convincing no one to rush:
Chaser of a girl with a ridiculous rack riding a bicycle down a bumpy road:
Chaser of former Bond girl, Olga Kurylenko, doing yoga:
If you missed last week’s Fail Friday, CLICK HERE, and be sure to check out the TFM Sweetheart of the Week, Haley Hines.
How did you miss making a joke about the BP shirt guy spilling something?
12 years ago at 2:29 pmIt’s actually a rush shirt from 2010 that behind the red cup says “We don’t spill.”
12 years ago at 10:24 amThe joker sounded like Jay Leno
12 years ago at 2:36 pmI think we need to start identifying those who are actually SigEps and those who are balanced girls. This is getting out of hand, well back in my day you’d never see so much malarkey. Not sure we can ever recover after this explosion of pure NF’edness.
12 years ago at 2:49 pmI don’t remember the last fail friday when some Sig Ep fuck up didn’t appear on these columns
12 years ago at 3:14 pmWait, so the guy in the Batman video is doing Patrick Bateman as The Joker?
12 years ago at 3:46 pmFUCK DISABLING COMMENTS ON THE SWEETHEART OF THE WEEK! It is our job to rip her apart, what part of that is so hard to understand INTERN! FUCK YOU!
12 years ago at 4:01 pmThe intern is giving fucks for us as of late.
12 years ago at 8:44 amFar too many.
12 years ago at 3:06 pmThat guy seems to have gotten some pool table on his cocaine.
12 years ago at 4:05 pm^this…
12 years ago at 12:57 amI’d love for my nose to be that bike seat.
12 years ago at 4:54 pmProud to be a SigEp but good lord, bro’s need to clean up their act.
12 years ago at 6:18 pmI love the fraternity, but so many chapters suck. Honestly, it’s a disgrace to see my “brothers” look like this. VDBL
12 years ago at 1:47 amHate to through my bro under the bus, but when I saw his dumbass outfit had to let Dorn see it, sure enough made FF. Raiden NF.
12 years ago at 6:20 pmThrow*
12 years ago at 4:07 pm