FAIL FRIDAY: Everyday is April Fools for TFM Intern
14 years ago

Why? Because it’s the anthem, and if I have to read these submissions, you have to listen to the goddamn anthem. SING IT:

Eleven real submissions, four photos and one video, that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Being a straight guy on the college cheer team. TFM.
-New Mexico

Good for you. Make sure you keep those spirit fingers extra hetero.

Woke up to eggs drenched in hot sauce. FM. Eating them off her chest. TFM.
-Michigan

Why dirty a plate when you can use her flat chest?

Using slampiece tears as anal lubricant. TFM.
-Virginia

For the love of God…not ok, man. Not ok.

As I get older my shorts will get shorter and my balls will hang lower. I think you see where this is going. TFM.
-Florida

This ends with your children no longer bringing your grandchildren over for Thanksgiving. Eventually they won’t show for Christmas, and then they’ll disown you altogether. Also, your balls will be taking a swim every time you take a dump.

I used urine as contact solution. TFM.
–D.C.

What kind of kick ass ocular infection did you get out of this? Seek medical attention.

There are two things that are frowned upon by society that bother me: jacking off and getting high. Both of which I have concluded are two of the best medicines ever. If combined they could potentially cure cancer. I plan on continuing my study. TFM.
–Tennessee

Finally, someone discovers the cure for cancer: masturbating high. This is exactly why you shouldn’t post TFMs right after you get stoned and spank it.

Man law only applies between friends, or at the urinal. Well, anytime dicks are out. TFM.
–Florida

COME ON. What possessed you to post this? Do you make ookie cookies at your chapter?

Cop arrested me so I shit in his back seat. Jokes on him. TFM.
–Kentucky

I think the joke is still on you. Now you’re in the back of a cop car, all covered in shit. How long did you spend in the psych ward? Sociopath.

I put the STD in stud all I need is u. TFM.
–Louisiana

…and a shot of penicillin, or a cycle of Valtrex.

Stole a bokk from the library, censor went off and i ran in my flipflops. TFM.
–New Mexico

You’ve never read a fucking book, so I assume you stole it in order to sell it and buy some of those flip-flops with the bottle openers on the bottom.

Considering polygamy so you can be connected to all your sisters forever. TSM.
–Utah

Incredibly creepy. Utah, you never cease to amaze me.

This might actually make your weekend better:

    1. Saint_Fratrics_day

      I feel sorry for any decent pike chapter that has to be associated with that picture. Pike is the lowest of the low on my campus and they are FaF compared to that picture

      14 years ago at 12:07 pm
    4. Stock Broker

      I’m a Pike and that picture is a fucking embarrassment. For the love of everything frat, do not by any means consider those geeds pikes just because they “graffiti’d” on a piece of plywood.

      14 years ago at 12:13 pm
    10. TazewellBROford1868

      Stock Broker and Robertson Howard, can we write a letter to nationals to blackball this colony? They aren’t even initiated yet.

      14 years ago at 11:30 am
  5. SigmaFratterson

    I totally would have vomited watching the tequila chug if I hadn’t gone through pledging.

    14 years ago at 12:06 pm
    1. Constantine Chapter

      haha pike and tke are the unfrattiest fucks at every school…sigs, kas, betas, atos, phi delts, and phi psi are the frattiest everywhere.

      14 years ago at 2:05 pm
    3. burrbetterthanyou

      very wrong ugly people, Although pike sucks at a lot of schools no fraternity is top tier at every school or even 1/2 of schools. every school is different so you can not judge an entire fraternity based on one chapter, if you think otherwise you’re a fucking idiot

      apparently common sense is anything but common on this site..

      14 years ago at 2:41 pm
    7. T3

      To be fair, common sense is no longer common at all…just change the name to what is should be…good sense

      14 years ago at 6:53 pm
    9. burrbetterthanyou

      to answer KAO, lets see here.. every school except ole miss

      if you consider top tier have entire pledge classes from the same high school then you might be top tier but that has nothing to do with it

      top tier means you’re at least top 3-5 (depending on size of school) in a couple of the following categories: Partying,Looks,Reputation,Class

      if you think otherwise you are again a fucking moron

      14 years ago at 9:19 pm
    10. FratStarMU

      KAO is nowhere near the top tier at Miami University. They barely manage to keep themselves out of the bottom tier

      13 years ago at 9:24 am
  7. brosta del mar 580s

    haha i like how he pukes on her face twice and she’s still standing there holding the trash bag….pussy

    14 years ago at 12:07 pm