FAIL FRIDAY: February Failure

Ten real submissions, 19 photos, and three videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Surprising your parents with an unannounced visit back home and walking in on your dad doing the maid from behind. Dude’s still got it. TFM.
–New York

It will take years of expensive therapy to correct that experience.

When the slam is so ugly you have to put a black trash bag over her face so you can finish, then being overjoyed when you realize it won’t be awkward cause you’ll never have to text her again cause she’s dead. TFM.
-Oklahoma

Shit just got real.

Going to Bat Mitzvah’s every weekend to try to slam elderly Jewish women because they give the best head. TFM.
-California

Mazel, mazel. Good things.

Donated my pubes to locks of love. TFM.
-Missouri

The minimum donation is 10-inches of hair, just for the record.

Whiskey dick helping me avoid gaining herpes. TFM.
-Massachusetts

Whiskey Dick: The anti-STD.

“Just flew in…AND BOY ARE MY ARMS TIRED.” tfm.
-Tennessee

Bravo. What an incredible lowercase TFM effort.

Can’t wait for this weekend to stick my FratCock in some SratVag. #TFM #FRAAAT
–ITT Tech

ITT Tech: Education for the future.

Farting on a slamming, then telling her, “See? Chivalry isn’t dead.” TFM.
–South Carolina

Pretty sure that’s a move from The Gentleman’s Handbook.

Wearing searsuckers, polo, and a sweater vest while playing Xbox Kinect golf when it’s 10 degrees out. TFM.
-Kentucky

You sir, are a huge loser.

Ever so deftly collecting sweat from my slampiece’s intergluteal cleft to bottle and sell online. TFM.
-Minnesota

That’s totally normal behavior.

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Don’t haze me bro.

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Whoops. TFM.

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Every now and then you’ve got to yack out of a tree.

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Sweet Jesus, look at that ‘stache.

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I get the feeling that seconds later this little girl took a fork to the eyeball.

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It’s Fratwinkle.

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I always pull my pants down before taking a seat.

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Biker gang frat tat?

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Some guys just don’t know when to quit.

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She must work out.

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This will probably prove ineffective.

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“Above the Influence” symbol tattoo is an all-time worst.

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“Weeeeeeee!”

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WARNING: Camo hoodie does not prevent projectile vomiting.

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What’s the theme of this party?

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Deep squats. TFM.

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He’s got nuts on his face.

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I think he’s moving too fast for her.

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He pooped his soul out.

God Bless Camera Phones:

God DAMN Regular Cameras:

Stair Luge Backflip:

Chaser to wash the bad away:

Read a sample chapter from the New York Times Best Seller, Total Frat Move, HERE, and grab your copy on Amazon, B&N, or in the iBookstore.

  1. ButtpeeMcgee

    Why in the fucking hell is there suddenly so much pi lambda phi bullshit on this website? Seriously did they just start 100 new chapters or something?

    12 years ago at 12:06 pm
  2. Honor Super Frat

    How come the only time I ever see ΚΔΡ on this website is on fail Friday? We’re better than this

    12 years ago at 12:07 pm
  3. Douglas MacArthur

    1. The submissions are like RFMs compared to Frat Misogynist’s stories.
    2. I keep seeing FF pics of people passed out on bathroom floors. Not only is that a fail, but they could also contract some undiscovered disease from the filth on the floor.
    3. Is the guy in the tree pic ejaculating out of his mouth?

    12 years ago at 12:08 pm
    1. Sleazy Asshole

      ^Why are you so fucking against him? Go be a feminist somewhere else, pussy.

      12 years ago at 1:21 pm
  4. jonny_OXville

    TFM tech guy should invent a system for counting how often each fraternity appears on fail friday.

    12 years ago at 12:46 pm
    1. Sleazy Asshole

      ^. Can someone with nothing to do go into the archives and count? I would, but fuck that shit.

      12 years ago at 1:22 pm
    2. Thad_Castle

      Give Bacon some Adderall and have him do it before he writes another self-promoting column.

      12 years ago at 7:02 am
  5. Franklin H Brobey

    Every time our letters are on Fail Friday, Ditka kills an orphan. And I don’t mean an African one on a commercial. I mean a full blooded American one. Let that be on your heads.

    12 years ago at 12:48 pm