FAIL FRIDAY: Frat City Bitch

Ten real submissions, four photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Some bitch was yelling at me, “Hey we’re trying to take a picture, move!” She pushed me against the wall, so I hit the bitch’s camera out of her hand and said, “I’m in a fraternity.” TFM.
–Kentucky

That’s the kind of asshole mentality that’ll have you riding the sexual express to Pound Town in no time.

Noticing a fully stocked bar from afar only to approach and realize they’re all empty…break dancing engaged. TFM.
–California

It’s not easy being a nearsighted, alcoholic, breakdancing robot.

Getting to watch the new Jersey Shore a day early because your dad knows the producer. TFM.
–North Carolina

You really thought this was the website you should brag about this on? You had nowhere else to go. You lonely fuck.

Frat so hard mother fuckers wanna fine me…for not paying my dues, showing up to meetings late, and shitting myself in the middle of the dance floor at a sorority formal. TFM.
–Oregon

This was gay, but I’ll party with you if you promise to shit the dancefloor.

Handing out your number on the back of your bank statement. TFM.
–Texas

I usually just jot down my number on the back of my Social Security card and give it out.

Went out to lunch with my boss and ordered a double whiskey rocks. He asked, “Do you think that’s appropriate?” I said, “Don’t be a pussy you old fuck.” He showed me his 10-year AA chip and fired me. TFM.
–Michigan

Fuck that guy. You didn’t need that job.

Still getting boners as frequently as you did at the age of 12. TFM.
–Florida

I’d say my boners-per-day (BPD) has slightly decreased since I was a 12-year-old.

Sometimes late at night I lay awake in bed and cry until my pillow is soaked, because I know I’ll never have a better chill-to-pull ratio than I have right now. TFM.
–Arizona

That’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Forgot to take my book to biology today. We had an open book exam. I failed. TFM.
–Tennessee

Congratulations you are a fucking amoeba of stupidity.

When I was a teenager my mom walked in on me masturbating at least 10 times. Today the dorm room janitor walked in on me. The only difference was when he asked if I needed a hand, I said yes. TFM.
–Wisconsin

Frat on good sir.


Brotherly love at its finest.


I’m definitely getting my next rush t-shirt made in a v-neck.


It’s really important that we all see the logo. Good job.


I think we all know what’s going on here. The kids don’t, but we do.

Remember that “I Love College” song? You won’t want to remember this:

Make it stop. Frat city bitch:

    1. FratRiley

      You’ve obviously heard of rack city considering it only says frat city in the above column.

      13 years ago at 4:52 pm
    1. Senator_frat1925

      The brown bag picture made me cringe… I never thought I would see my letters on fail Friday…

      13 years ago at 2:27 pm
    2. Jon M Fratsman

      I’d literally never heard of Chi Lambda Phi before….I just assumed it was an honors society that handed out letters like candy.

      13 years ago at 2:26 am
    3. Senator_frat1925

      yeah, pretty much… I have no defense for that either. Nationally, my fraternity sucks, and only has like 2 chapters that don’t.

      13 years ago at 12:53 am
    1. grandfrat

      What letters was he saying? I couldn’t make out what “frat” he was in? Sounded like ADP.. I dunno, I have a hard time when understanding people when they speak in that foreign tongue “blac-cent”

      13 years ago at 2:22 am
    2. EX_mirf

      nah he’s the homie at Yale. he’s in ADP, and he reps out the other fraternities in the same area of the campus – zeta and DKE. also, when forced to meet with his dean about makin the song, his dean fuckin loved it. TFM

      13 years ago at 2:33 pm
    3. AccuFrat

      If this guy goes to Yale then I guess I am in fratcity. I’ve never heard this song in my life. I don’t know who DaLegend is. I have a very hard time believing he isn’t just some new haven local who deals to fraternities

      13 years ago at 3:44 pm
    1. MOMOgotMojo

      glad i wasnt the only one that noticed. No SAE can every talk shit again with Sandusky as a brother.

      13 years ago at 11:41 pm
    1. fratforestuniversity

      i stopped reading when this guy said “the tau shirt might actually be cool..”

      13 years ago at 7:05 pm