FAIL FRIDAY: Halloween Horror

Ten real submissions, 19 photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Shitting in your pumpkin to surprise GDI pumpkin smashers. TFM.
-Colorado

Totally normal countermeasure.

Basket full of roofies for trick-or-treaters because my neighborhood frats hard. TFM.
-Arkansas

Enjoy prison, psycho.

What did the active ghost say to the pledge ghost? “Do not SPOOK until SPOOKEN to!” It’s a TFM.
-Illinois

And now I fucking hate Halloween.

Checking your bank account before every drink you order at the bar. Not because you’re worried about affording it, but because you want the girl you’re ordering for to peek at your balance. TFM.
–Alabama

You are the king of the douches.

Drinking all your drinks, alcoholic or not, out of a beer bong. TFM.
-Illinois

Filling a beer bong with Lucky Charms and milk for breakfast tomorrow.

Shitting in the display toilet at Lowe’s while your massive cock hangs over the edge of the toilet seat. TFTC.
-California

Gross, dude.

Putting catnip on the tip of your dick so the frat cat can lick it with its raspy tongue. TFM.
–School o’ Da Hard Knocks

Peanut butter on your balls for the frat hound wasn’t getting you off anymore?

Plopping a thunderdumpling into my slam’s cobbler gobbler. It’s a TFM. #poopinhermouth #peeinherbutt #KONY2013
–DeVry University

I really wish DeVry University had a campus that could block TFM.

Nothing like waking up to some slampakes after a good nights exercise, “TFM”
-Texas

A comma and quotation marks? That’s not how we do things around here.

Get to the castle, pop a cherry, blow a line like Rick Perry. Slap a slut on the butt then give the boys a “what what.” Hop in the tahoe, swervin’ while rubbing my girl’s camel toe. See my sister walkin’ to class, ass like a baboon, the things I’d do to spoon. TFM.
–California

Pass the mic to me, so I can strangle you with it.


Seriously, watch your children.


I hope that WNBA game was exciting.


Gotta pay dues somehow, I guess.


Dual TKE monster trucks scream overcompensation.


This is why your chapter couldn’t meet its philanthropy quota.


The Big Bang Theory poster in the background shouldn’t be overlooked.


This guy is the opposite of The Fonz.


Reversing traditional sex roles. TFM.


The Duke is turning in his grave.


The Space Jam thigh tat on chicken legs.


If you’re going to dress like a lady, at least sit like one.


Pledge passed out and woke up with the preamble written on his back, and that guy’s tongue in his ear.


Twins are so cute.


Looks like my kind of party.


You guys might have a problem…


Don’t give me that sass.


Look at these Alpha Sigma Boners.


Blending in. TFM.


Rush boobs of an undetermined sex.

UT and A&M are never ever getting back together:

Scottie Shine wants your vote:

Melanie Iglesias chaser to wash it down:

If you missed last week’s Fail Friday, click here. Also, check out this week’s TFM Sweetheart of the Week, and rush boobs for breast cancer awareness.

  1. EmpireBusiness

    Why is the first TFM on here a fail? Fuck pumpkin smashers. Those assholes. They deserve to have shit on them

    12 years ago at 3:12 pm
    1. TFM Intern

      Because you shit in a pumpkin and put it on your front step just in case someone comes to smash it…

      12 years ago at 3:16 pm
    2. kjevb

      While we hate to side with the soon to be dead Intern-Pledge, the TotalRatMove SuperPAC must endorse his comment. But fuck you Intern.

      12 years ago at 3:39 pm
    3. steve39555

      No fuck that. That’s why you shit in it. Because the sonnabitches wanted to smash it. Logic, motherfuckers…

      12 years ago at 1:56 am
    4. Fraterday123

      Just got some sick custom hats for my frat that’s actually made in America, not like that made in China Rowdy Gentleman crap! campusretro dot com.

      12 years ago at 4:35 pm
    1. LEGENwaitforitDARY

      ^ Your name. I hate that with a fiery passion. I hope you are involved in a massive traffic collision that kills you and no one else. But not an instantaneous death. No, I want you to die in a manner in which you are alive for several days, but in critical condition and in execrable pain. You will be miserable, and once you think that the worst is over and you think that you will peacefully slip into the eternal sleep, your childhood enemy will randomly arrive and choke you to death.

      Love, LEGENwaitforitDARY 🙂

      12 years ago at 7:57 pm
  2. Call me Sir FratStar

    Where is fail Saturday? I will skull fuck your whole family and kill your dad and knock up your mother

    12 years ago at 3:17 pm