FAIL FRIDAY: Have a Holly Jolly Christmas

Ten real submissions, five photos, and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Dropped over $500 at American Eagle this weekend cause everything was on sale. TFM.
–Michigan

Way to take advantage of the holiday savings.

Slampiece gave me road head, while she drived. TFM.
–Oklahoma

While she “drived?” Jesus, Oklahoma.

Crop dusting your parole officer while taking a piss test. TFM.
–Georgia

Your fucking parole officer? Probation officer…maybe, but parole officer? No.

What do Kim Jong II and my ex-girlfriend have in common? They both died at 69. TFM.
–Alabama

If Kim Jong Il participated in 69 he’d have to get his toes sucked.

Ripping cigs, sipping on expensive ass scotch, and donning a motherfucking fedora. TFM.
–Arizona

Yeah! Yeah! What?

One sign of an STD and slammy will be hearing from my lawyer…who is also my dad. TFM.
-Florida

This is a perfect example of a “my dad is frat” joke gone wrong.

Knowing I’ll come back from Christmas break tanner than when I left. TFM.
-Georgia

I really expected a “TSM” on the end of this one.

Asking doc for suppositories instead of chewables. TFM.
-Indiana

This is one of those purposely bad TFMs that takes me one step closer to a random act of violence.

Submitting TFM after TFM, even though none of your previous postings got submitted. TFM.
-Georgia

Because you’re a fucking halfwit.

Every Christmas Eve I dress up as the Grinch and hide under my 6-year-old sister’s bed until she climbs in to sleep, then I jump out and growl until she cries and pisses herself. TFM.
-Texas

Good for you. Haze the Christmas sprit into your 6-year-old sister.


Dibs on bottom bunk!


When your paddle doubles as a fantasy battle sword. TFM.


This is why you don’t play Modern Warfare when you get home from the bar.


“Santa, do you have a roll of quarters in your pocket or something?”


This came close to ruining my Christmas.

I thought I’d do things a little bit differently this week. It is Christmas, after all. Merry Christmas fellas…

  1. ice cold frat

    girl in the video probably thinks it’s funny until i play “pick your own adventure” with her

    13 years ago at 6:49 pm
  2. InHocSignoDrinkes

    First Sigma Chi FF in a long time. I guess you can’t stay safe forever.

    13 years ago at 8:29 pm
    1. rainbowsociety

      nullified by the fact it’s always complete queers wearing your letters every time.

      13 years ago at 10:57 pm
    2. WilliamTSherman

      Sigma chi was the first picture on last weeks fail friday, so your all wrong

      13 years ago at 5:40 pm
  3. BrotherOmicron

    2011 Tiers

    1. Pikapp, Dsig, Beta Sig
    2. KDR, Acacia, Sig Chi, SAE
    3. Lambda Chi, Pike, Sammy, DTD
    4. Sig Pi, ATO, Alpha Sig, Sig Ep
    5. TDX , Phi Tau, Zeta Psi, TKE, Sig Nu
    6. Tau Delt, Far Sig, Phi Who, DKE, AXP
    7. Pi Lamb, Skulls, AKL, Phi Psi, AGR, AEPi
    8. Theta Chi, Sig Tau, Kappa Sig, TEP, Triangle

    13 years ago at 12:14 am
    1. Fraterick Southgate

      ^Aren’t you the scoob from the Chloe Kardashian TSM? Get the fuck out of here pledge.

      13 years ago at 12:25 am
    2. Jon M Fratsman

      1. This list is dead wrong
      2. You left off Beta. I’d put them at 3
      3. This list is really, really fucking wrong

      13 years ago at 8:52 pm
    3. VAfratnasty

      Fucking Tau Delt has 10 active chapters. And they’re all geeds. Which makes them dead last. Laps.

      13 years ago at 6:29 pm
    4. Mr Hazer

      you got it all wrong… top houses are PhiPsi, Chi, Sigep, SAE, Sammy, and what about PhiKap? and even tho i hate them Beta Theta Pi. Pike no way theta chi is higher than 8. kappa sig is higher than 8 too.

      13 years ago at 4:19 am
    5. frattywood

      It depends on the campus. Most fraternities have some chapters that are FaF and others that might as well be geeds. I think we can all agree though that Lexington Triad and Miami Triad = FaF.

      13 years ago at 10:58 am
    6. Jon M Fratsman

      Also:
      1. Pi Kapp does not get a number 1 tier spot
      2. Acacia? Are you fucking kidding me?

      13 years ago at 9:48 pm