FAIL FRIDAY: New Year, More Failure

Ten real submissions, 20 photos, and three videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Fingering your cousin and finding your grandpa’s wedding ring. TFM.
-Alabama

I’d like to thank the state of Alabama for starting the year 2013 on the wrong foot.

Having a registered sex offender living in the frat castle. TFM.
-Indiana

It’s not a good thing when your house shows up as a red dot on the sex offender map.

Taking your puppies to the dog park before their balls get cut off so they can pound whores. TFM.
–Connecticut

What a loving owner you are.

“Oh no officer, that’s pre-workout on my dash, not coke.” TSwoleAsFuckM.
-Georgia

Getting jacked in 2013? Cop’s gotta respect that.

Shotgunning a beer at the front of the chapel instead of drinking the communal wine during Christmas Eve mass. TFM.
-Texas

If someone actually did this, and video footage existed, it would be the greatest thing ever.

Submitting so many TFM’S you could’nt begin to count them. Not one of them get’s posted and you STILL do’nt give a fuck. TFM.
-Arizona

They probably don’t get posted because you don’t know how to use a goddamn apostrophe.

Cutting your finger-nails before going out, cause you know you’re gonna get massive poon-tang. TFM.
–Arkansas

That’s just common courtesy.

Subconsciously thinking “frat” when feeling FaF. TFM.
–Virginia

The fuck is wrong with you, son?

Throwing a coozie on the spitter. TFM.
-New York

Wouldn’t want your nicotine-laced saliva to get warm.

Getting “Holy shit where’s a pledge I think my dick is dying dude what happened I was fucking this slam when I accidently hit my dick with a champagne bottle and fell down” drunk. TFM.
-Georgia

New year, same idiots.


GDI Panda.


Sweet ride, bro.


Showering with multiple kegs. TFM.


These kids are too far gone to make fun of.


2 Chainz!


That’s an artsy subway shot.


Hell yeah fucking right.


I wish I could click that thumbs up button so badly.


Blackface is really racially insensitive, kid.


Merry Christmas from a PIKE hybrid of Paul Bunyan and Carrot Top.


It’s casual.


Double cargos.


“Shaving your letters into your head” is 2013’s “Polo horse chest tattoo.”


Pledge Michael Phelps owned that fucking costume.


That’s a shameful way to pass out.


Looks like a solid purchase.


Selfies in the house just aren’t the same.


Now that’s an award to be proud of.


Personification of the word “badass.”


Thank God Christmas is over.

Freshman’s first beer bong:


Good job, good effort.

Beer pong table feels the cold sting of death:

Girls with too much time on their hands have silly fun:

Chaser to wash away the bad:

Two chapters from the TOTAL FRAT MOVE book are online NOW, read them HERE.

    1. Sleazy Asshole

      Try stranglebating on your knees with a belt tied around the doorknob and a batman costume on. It’s easier.

      12 years ago at 12:46 pm
    1. Joseph Kony

      The kid in front of the Lambda house at SMU is not a Lambda. If that makes it any better.

      12 years ago at 7:08 pm
    2. A great American

      ^ yes all the houses look like that, he didn’t ask if the school owned them.

      12 years ago at 12:02 pm
    1. Minnebrota Brophers

      There is a correlation at Minnesota sig chi of shittier and shittier pledges with an increase in gang rapes.

      12 years ago at 3:32 pm
  1. natty_splatties

    “Taking your puppies to the dog park before their balls get cut off so they can pound whores. TFM.”

    I submitted this purely to make the top fails, purebreds get the most tail!

    12 years ago at 12:58 pm
      1. Dildo T Baggins

        Fucking piece of shit app. Meant that for natty splatties not you cockmeatsandwhich

        12 years ago at 2:57 pm
    1. dip lip

      ^ Wait, so you do or you don’t like Cockmeatsandwich’s name? Goddamn it Dildo T Baggins, I never know what the fuck you’re trying to say! Get your shit together

      12 years ago at 4:32 pm
      1. Dildo T Baggins

        Sorry for the confusion here. I like both of their names but unfortunately nattie splatties likes to sit on carrots.

        12 years ago at 2:48 pm
    1. OurHero

      ^age restriction fuuuucckkkk. I guess 3rd graders like me don’t get to witness Ms. Jones in all her glory!

      12 years ago at 2:08 pm
    1. SackMaster

      ^i hunt quail Jeremy! They’re overpopulated in this region and they’re decimating the grub-worm population, now you got a fucking problem with that?

      12 years ago at 8:29 pm
  2. RebelDrinker

    Fingering your cousin and finding your grandpa’s wedding ring. TFM.
    That’s funny shit.

    12 years ago at 1:46 pm