FAIL FRIDAY: New Year, Same Shit
Ten real submissions, 17 photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.
Getting “beat the shit out of your 10-year-old cousin” drunk. TFM.
That’s not good.
Getting tonsillitis from a girl you sleeped with, but still telling everyone it was worth it. TFM.
Did you just use “sleeped” as the past tense of sleep? Impressively stupid.
Ruining family vacation plans by projectile vomiting in the minivan the morning after but not getting in trouble by blaming “motion sickness.” TFM.
You’re a real inconsiderate prick, you know that?
Running around your house naked as fuck on a Thursday night. TFM.
What an animal.
You’re only goal for 2015 being to drink more than you did in 2014. TFM.
You should have another goal: learning the difference between “you’re” and “your,” you blithering idiot.
Powerpointing every single time your professor says the word “PowerPoint.” TFM.
The trying is strong with this one.
I always carry another pair of undies on me in case I shart…or cum. TFM.
You’re a disgusting human being.
Using retards for your D-line. TSabanM.
Roll retards!
Being too busy poundin’ brews and slammin’ hoes to celebrate Christmas. TFM.
Jesus will be addressing this TFM submission when he’s tossing you into the fires of Hell.
Pulling a Hooters waitress, fucking her in the Hooters bathroom, then not leaving her a tip. TFM.
No, no you didn’t. But yes, that would be a TFM.
Honestly, I didn’t think you had it in you intern.
11 years ago at 4:14 pmWe’ve been waiting for this since last year, and you have the cojones to post it late???? I wrote you a poem, cockroach.
Intern,
You’re a real fucking asshole,
My dream is that you get swallowed by a black hole,
You lack whit, and suck black dick,
And your breath probably smells like rat shit,
Oh intern, oh intern, you’ve never brought me much joy,
But Fail Fridays used to make me as happy as Roger Dorn is,
After touching little boys,
Fuck you and your bullshit,
I’ve said it once, I’ll say it twice,
For all these disappointments, you’ll have to pay a price,
What shall it be, you may be asking?
An anal pounding, from a dude that’s packing?
Or make you sky dive, without a parachute,
Or make you walk on glass and used condoms, without a pair of shoes,
So many sick scenarios play out in my head,
In many of them you would end up dead,
But today, I’ll let you keep your life, if you relieve us of our TFM boredom,
And I ask you, Dorno, and Tech Guy, can you please bring back the forums?
#HandsUpDon’tBall #NewYearNewForums #PostFailFridayAt12EST
11 years ago at 4:15 pmGod you’re sick.
11 years ago at 4:18 pmFuck you, cockroach! Stop using recycled content as chasers!
11 years ago at 4:26 pmEST. FaF.
11 years ago at 4:22 pmI didn’t know shibby was a black bear.
11 years ago at 4:33 pmBlackballed*
11 years ago at 1:55 pmRIP #Ballocaust
11 years ago at 4:18 pmJerry Jones is fucking moron. Your dribble is embarrassing.
11 years ago at 5:25 pmTaylorcoug is an avid soccer fan but talks shit about it on the TFM comments section so people think he’s cool
11 years ago at 7:43 pmHey Taylor, its drivel, you fucking moron.
11 years ago at 8:06 pmThe poem was subpar, but the GIF is fire.
11 years ago at 8:39 pmThis was beautiful.
11 years ago at 9:01 pmThe JerryJones parade on every article is really starting to get old
11 years ago at 9:49 pmOh yeah, champ? Tell me how you really feel, though.
11 years ago at 3:08 amtldr. fuck you. asshole.
11 years ago at 12:40 amseriously…..
11 years ago at 3:38 pmApparently new year same shit also applies to the intern being a lazy asshole who posts fail Friday late
11 years ago at 4:17 pmHOW IS IT “LATE?” DIE!
11 years ago at 4:19 pmIntern you are literally too stupid to insult so I will insult your cumdumpster of a mother instead I would like to take her to a nice seafood dinner and never call her again #BlackBallMeIDareYou
11 years ago at 4:26 pmWhere was last weeks? you intern piece of shit
11 years ago at 5:35 pmHow is it NOT late? Your job, whether you realize it or not, is to get page views, assface. Your users would click a lot more if you posted this while they were stuck at work IN FRONT OF THEIR MOTHERFUCKING COMPUTERS, instead of after they’ve mostly left and started drinking already.
11 years ago at 5:55 pmYou had a chance to lift yourselves from the depths with an early and awesome Fail Friday, yet the only fail seen here was your mother for not leaving you locked in the basement chained up like fucking sloth.
11 years ago at 8:49 pmI hope Bacon eats a bunch of Chipotle and takes a big, runny, ginger dump on your keyboard. It’ll still be less shitty than the work you do.
“New Year, Same Shit”
Yeah like the intern taking forever to post this
11 years ago at 4:23 pmI just said that you lazy bastard
11 years ago at 4:28 pmYou want a cookie or something?
11 years ago at 4:40 pmWorldstar is useful for something besides ghetto fights? This is news.
11 years ago at 4:23 pmIntern some of us are vacationing in time zones where it literally is fail Saturday now I was hoping for a new year new you I’m disappointed but not surprised
11 years ago at 4:23 pmIntern maybe I should lynch you instead
11 years ago at 4:24 pmQuestionable username buddy…
11 years ago at 5:06 pmWell this is awkward.
11 years ago at 5:59 pmYou are pushing me to my point break
11 years ago at 6:02 pmYou “both” are from Mississippi and created the accounts within 24 hours of each other. I’m sure that this is just a coincidence.
11 years ago at 9:56 pmWell then I’m about to drop a bombshell on you, it wasn’t a coincidence. My friend noticed I spelled Patrick wrong and made another account
11 years ago at 10:58 pmIntern, I’m going to go bang your mother and then send it to Brazzers for everyone to see. Fuck you.
11 years ago at 4:25 pmNew Balance 993’s are FAF.
11 years ago at 4:25 pmMario is clearly down with the syndrome
11 years ago at 4:27 pm