FAIL FRIDAY: Tucking Your Boner
TFM Intern12 years ago

Ten real submissions, 20 photos, and four videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Asking the slam if she goes Greek. TFM. (To The Editor: Going Greek means if she does anal. It’s a lowkey word to use for prostitutes.)
-Illinois

Thanks for that matter-of-fact explanation, weirdo.

The vintage, “So there I was, sniffing her butt…” story while playing wingman for your bro at the bar. TFM.
-Tennessee

You set ’em up with the butt sniffing, he knocks ’em down with the gooch wax.

Hitting the gym and then kitchen to bake some swolehouse cookies to deliver to the sorostitutes without a shirt on. Easy pussy. TFM.
-Georgia

Shirtless cookie deliveries get bitches moist.

Climbing down the chimney of the sorority house, because I always give the bitches what they want. TFM.
-Texas

Like Santa Claus, or a rapist.

The Jurassic park girl having to move for the T-Rex to notice her. TFM.
–Maryland

Stupid little slutski.

Punching little kids in the dick. TFM.
-Mississippi

We do not endorse child penis punching.

The classic “chill out bro” after another bro flips out on you for trying to give him a handjob. TFM.
-North Carolina

Classic.

Telling the hot slammy working at McDonald’s that my meal is not the only thing she just super sized. TgotaboneratmickeydM.
–Oklahoma

Nothing like a good McDonald’s boner.

Understanding that being in a frat doesn’t mean maintaining a higher BAC than GPA; that brotherhood isn’t defined by lines, be they racial, socio-economic, or Mason-Dixon; that instead, brotherhood is that incommunicable bond shared between two men; that bond which will never die. TFM.
-Massachusetts

Understanding that you are a fucking LOSER.

Finger blasting a high schooler in the ass in the shower in a bowtie while I make my little brother watch and take notes on how a true fratstar wins all the time. TrichdaddybowtieFM.
-North Carolina

Annnd that’ll do it for this week’s one-liners.

What a cute calendar.