FAIL FRIDAY: Urinal Cake
12 years ago

Ten real submissions, ten photos, and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Going to the mall to buy some Sperry’s and the hot sales lady asks you if you’re in a frat. Then walking away with her number. TFM.
-California

I can say with 100% confidence that you are a loser and I would blackball the shit out of you.

In Vegas, but decided to stay in and watch a movie with my brothers. RFM.
–DeVry University

In New Orleans, standing in the middle of Bourbon Street with a sign that says “Masturbate and die.” RFM.

Jerking a cock a day keeps the geeds away. TFTC.
-Virginia

MASTURBATE AND DIE.

This morning’s breakfast was some bullshit. My dad’s trophy wife (my stepmother) sobbed for a solid 28 minutes about her inevitable “downsizing” from her new Benz to an ’07 Jaguar. Dad said, “Son times are tough, you might even have to let the Lex or BMW go.” I immediately excused my self from the table. TFM.
-Alabama

Timing how long your stepmom sobs. TFM.

Some GDI in cargos showed up at our rush party, so we got him blackout and then took the frat hound’s shit and filled each one of his pockets with it and taped a sign that says “so that’s what all those pockets are for” to his forehead. TFM.
–Texas

Great work on the sign, master prankster. You’re a creative genius.

Banging ass cleavage. TFM.
–Florida

You watch too much porn.

A nurse at the hospital I work at told me to stop dipping at work. The doc I work for came by, packed a lip out of my can, and promptly told the bitch to pick up his lunch for the cafeteria. TFM.
– Louisiana

Unless you’re time traveling and working in the 1950s he won’t be a doctor for long.

Bruce Wayne getting friend-zoned after 35 years of chasing Rachel Dawes, then getting killed a month after hooking up with a foreigner and a whiny 99 percenter who dresses like a cat. NF.
–Tennessee

Bad-mouthing Bruce Wayne is the same as bad-mouthing America.

My dad just went to white collar prison for tax evasion, and my therapist says I have entitlement issues. TFM.
-North Carolina

Both might actually be TFM’s, but not the kind you talk about.

Telling bitches to shut up, getting your nut up, and calling another slut up. TFM.
–Michigan

This is my motto for the weekend.


Reminds me of this.


That transvestite’s leotard is less gay than those cargos.


The elusive neon hoodie garners an immediate diagnosis of trying too hard syndrome.


“You need a ride bro? Hop on the back and hold on tight!”


Apparently this is a “massively multiplayer online role playing game” called Star Wars: The Old Republic, and some TKE nerd is running around repping hard.


The economy has hit some harder than others.


They’re all rocking facial expressions that suggest one of them ripped nasty ass.


The girl on the left isn’t laughing, but I am.


One of the most disturbing pictures in the history of the internet.


Powerpointing with your gut out while a brother fingers your 3-inch deep belly button. TFM.

Some jackass eating a corner of a urinal cake:

CHASER: Porn star hula hoop

If you missed last week’s Fail Friday, CLICK HERE. Also be sure to check out TFM Sweetheart of the Week, Nicole O’Connor.

  3. The Standard

    I’m going to start needing an NSFW warning before checking fail friday. Boss man was not amused.

    12 years ago at 12:29 pm
    7. Bronan the Barbarian

      Also, apparently the dude in the picture grinding up on another dude may be a KA at Maryland, but this is unconfirmed.

      12 years ago at 11:08 am
  6. Jon M Fratsman

    KA, Phi Psi, AEPi….TKE and Pike. Nice spread today. And don’t tell me I’m the only one to notice how hard SAE has struggled recently

    12 years ago at 1:43 pm
    1. BamaForRomney

      SAE is quickly turning into a nationally bottom tier fraternity. Believe it or not, Pike used to be top tier nation wide in the 70s. The “rush everyone” attitude brings them down. Bottom line, if they were a stock, it would be time to sell.

      12 years ago at 5:20 pm
    2. Jon M Fratsman

      They have had a lot of bad publicity recently, that’s for sure (and I don’t mean on TFM). I believe you on the Pike thing, because I know for a fact that Kappa Sig also used to be absolutely tops pretty much everywhere.

      12 years ago at 6:16 pm
    3. I am drot nunk

      Tops back in the day, like the 70’s up to the late 90’s included SAE, SigChi, KA(south), Kappa Sig, and maybe Phi Delt. Throw in Lambda Chi, SigNu, Fiji, and ATO. All were or are still tops. That’s what my father and grandfather would say. It really doesn’t matter. Who gives a shit? If the fraternity you are in right now is amazing on your campus, but sucks everywhere else, cool. At least you are in the right fraternity on the right campus. The only time where national rankings really matter is after college, and even then it’s seldom. Your network is usually based off of your fraternities population.

      12 years ago at 11:18 pm
  11. thefratasticmrfox

    Goddammit PKP why do you usually have someone on fail friday? You make me facepalm that I am your brother.

    12 years ago at 2:48 pm
    1. Bronan the Barbarian

      We don’t usually. I’m counting like 4 times in the last year. We’re somewhere up there with KA and a few other chapters for least appearances. It could be worse. We could be having Pike-like extravaganzas of fail.

      12 years ago at 4:34 pm
    2. InHocSooner

      ^ Pike has actually stayed relatively quiet lately on FF. TKE seems to have taken the throne and sprinted with it the past few months.

      12 years ago at 5:03 pm
    3. RaginHazinCajun

      PIKE hasn’t been on the past 6 or 7 fail fridays. Until today of course.

      12 years ago at 5:59 pm
    4. Jon M Fratsman

      TKE, Pi Kapp, and unfortunately, Sigma Chi, all had pretty solid runs on here during the spring semester.

      12 years ago at 6:18 pm
    5. I am drot nunk

      The fraternities with the least FF’s are usually the ones that don’t matter, like the very small and irrelevant ones. However you see some of them every now and then up here. The fraternities that are big nationally but aren’t up here often are KA, Lambda Chi, and Pikapp. I’m sure there are others but I don’t remember EVERY fraternity posted on FF. I just know that Pike and Teke get a lot of shit, and SAE and SigChi has had it’s long runs.

      12 years ago at 11:23 pm
    6. CantDriveDixieDown

      Pike hasn’t been up here for a while. Today is first in a a couple months.

      12 years ago at 6:45 pm