FAIL FRIDAY: Who Cares? You’re All Stoned

Ten real submissions, ten photos, and two videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Fckued a gril wtih dyslexia, she saw the tatotoo on my dcik and aksed waht TMF maent. TFM.
-Washington

It’s cute when two special people with learning disabilities get together.

I’m going to name my firstborn daughter Crystal after my dad’s favorite party drug. TFM.
–Virginia

And she’ll grow up to be a classy sorostitute who chugs dong for ice, just like your dad.

Walked by a brutal car accident where a lady was pleading for me to help her. I said “Deal with it” as I put on my Costas. TFM.
–Georgia

Classic tale of The Frat Samaritan.

Just got initiated. Thank God. When I was a pledge I got shame boners during every lineup and had to start taping my wiener to my taint. TFM.
–Illinois

Another future leader of America.

Worst part of being frat? Forgetting to turn your swag off before bed and waking up covered in bitches. TFM.
–Michigan

The only thing you’ve ever woken up covered in is your own urine and the smell of loneliness.

My mom told me I had to join AA when I came home for summer, so I upper-deckered her toilet and told her it was ok because I’m in a frat. TFTC.
–Texas

Everyone knows you’re not FaF until you’ve dropped a steamer in the upper-deck of your mom’s toilet.

Regularly blowing inside of girls and then pretending to freak out yelling “Fuck! You’re pregnant! You’re pregnant!” and waiting 10 minutes to tell them you’re totally impotent and your sperm count is fucking zero. TFM.
–Nebraska

Pranks really are good fun.

Sliding up against randos on the dance floor and whispering “eat my fuck hammer” in their ear. TFM.
–Indiana

I am 100% doing this in the next 24 hours.

Peed in her butt then finished with a swift kick to the gut. Put an end to the rumor that girls don’t poo. TFM.
–California

It seriously ruined my entire day when I read this submission.

I was on acid and Molly at Coachella when hologram 2pac came on stage. My friends said I started crying and shouting “THUG LIFE!” at the top of my lungs with tears streaming down my face until I had a seizure and passed out. TupacTC.
–California

I’m way TupacTC.


“Marvin, you be on the bottom.” “Why?” “Because you’ve got man titties.” “Oh, okay.”


This guy has never scored a point in anything. Ever.


Putting ipecac in your GDI grandson’s Easter eggs. TFM.


What a fucking idiot, says everyone behind this guys back.


“Take another shot out of my hairy naval! Rub your nose on my fuzzy belly!”


Take note of the “This gentleman is fucked up!” tank top, and realize that either a horrible friend or hilarious nurse took and submitted this picture.


I think that dog shit marker job is a bigger fail than them passing out.


“How do my chins look with these sunglasses and hat?”


Socks. NF.


This is a picture of 2 shirtless guys, another in a gorilla suit and another dressed as a woman standing next to a photo of 2 elephants doing it doggie style on top of a photo of a lion smiling. Anyone out there stoned and crying?

What can I say?


Another unintentionally hilarious video. It’s not that his message is funny, it’s his delivery and the fact that with all that brotherhood he still had to film this on his webcam.

Hot girls have problems too…


I would rather let Rebecca Black fire a Roman candle up my ass than listen to that again.

If you missed last week’s Fail Friday or the TFM Spring Break Photo Contest Results, there they are. Also, be sure to buy a ticket for TFM Day Rage HERE.

  1. geed_stomper

    Love all my Fiji brothers, always mighty proud to be a Fiji. (even if someone ends up on fail friday after giving zero fucks) P! from Alpha Sigma

    13 years ago at 10:01 am
  2. bnwrangler

    Sad to see FIJI made it on here, it’s been a while. But on the other hand, “eat my fuck hammer” sounds like Rob Delaney.

    13 years ago at 10:43 am
  3. fratmydickbitch

    The TKE trying to catch that ball might be the worst attempt of anything that involves athletic ability ever.

    13 years ago at 11:06 am