Get A Hobby And Become A Man, You Bum

PortlandPledgeHazers8 years ago

Since when did it become the norm to have no legitimate interests of any kind? Ask practically any woman alive that doesn’t “live to travel” or is a self-described “adventurer” what she does in her free time and you are bound to hear something about watching reruns of Friends while eating pizza and drinking Franzia. The sad truth is that men, too, are now being stricken by this dormant lifestyle. Ask yourself this, what are your hobbies? While a lot of you probably would give some lame answer about the gym or drinking, the truth is these are not real interests at all. You drink because you’re human and getting drunk is fun as hell and you go to the gym to try to mend the treacherous effects that said drinking has had on your once young body.

During the summertime it is easy to drink the days away without a regret in sight, yet in reality you will have ample time to pick up some new interests. I am certainly not knocking getting blackout by the pool a couple days a week, chasing ass, or hitting the gym, but make time for real hobbies too. Go buy a rod and pick up fly fishing, go on a duck hunt with your pledge brothers, hell even start submitting articles to this site. Just break the monotonous cycle of every day life and actually challenge yourself with some type of enjoyable task.

Part of what is so great about having hobbies is that they can also help aid your normal and despicable habits. Make girls think you are way more interesting than you are and persuade your parents that you are not a burnout piece by picking up new interests. Take woodworking for example. Seems completely useless if we’re being frank, right? Wrong. This is actually just a total facade. With your newfound love of woodworking you have already built your chapter 3 new pong tables as well as a new bench to smoke cigs on while loudly mocking anyone who passes by before you even know it. BOOM. You’re supporting your cigarette and drinking habits while seeming like a functioning human being. The perfect crime. Beyond this your woodworking expertise leaves you as the perfect critic to absolutely destroy the pledges as they work on their pledge class project.

Even the most meaningless hobbies can open many new doors for you, so what are you waiting for? Find something that is of moderate interest to you and make it your bitch. You will end up feeling fulfilled while simultaneously seeming like you’re actually a functioning member of society, not just a fiend for pizza and boxed wine. The world is your oyster. Now go and try something new..

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