The Golf Ball Diver Who Was Attacked By An Alligator Should Probably Reevaluate His Career Choice

Dent8 years ago

Of all of the idiotic jobs, scuba diving for golf balls in gator-infested waters has to make the short list. So when pro ball retriever Scott Lahodik got more than he bargained for on his latest dive, he had no one to blame but himself. Lucky for Scott, he was able to act fast and avoid a Chubbs-like scenario (at least for this go-around).

From CBS Sports:

Golf ball diver Scott Lahodik was diving for balls recently at a golf course in Florida at the Rotonda Golf & Country Club when an alligator bit him.

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“He just came and, full blast, grabbed my arm all the way back in his throat and then he started to roll with me,” Lahodik told the Orlando Sentinel. “He rolled a couple times and then he still didn’t let go so I knew I had to do something, so I started punching him up by the eye and then he let go.”

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The gator will be euthanized, according to Golf Channel, which seems a bit extreme.

Finding yourself elbow-deep in gator is a type of intimacy that most of us would like to avoid. Then again, most of us would probably check for gators before diving headfirst into murky water at a Florida country club.

Not to make a snap judgement, but given his profession our boy Scott doesn’t seem like the brightest of the bunch. Hopping into lakes with gators isn’t all that logical, unless of course you’re in a mid-90s comedy about an eccentric hockey player turned golfer.

Scott was only able to make his Houdini-like escape because of an ability to take swift action. Having never been faced with this predicament before, he decided to put blind faith behind one of the oldest myths in the book; legend has it that the only way to tame an alligator is with a firm eye poke. So what did Scott Lahodik do? He feverishly punched at that gator’s eyes until those jaws opened up long enough for him to make a run for it.

Perhaps the most shocking part of this story is the part of the source writer’s analysis wherein he calls euthanizing the gator “a bit extreme.” Are you kidding me? We should be euthanizing every alligator. This guy had to get over 400 stitches. Granted it was totally his fault and he shouldn’t have been there in the first place, but still. How many stitches did that kid Harambe dragged around need? I’m not sure if it was any at all. It certainly wasn’t 400, that’s for sure (though, to be fair, they mowed ‘rambe down pretty quick).

Also, I have to ask: are there actually people out there purchasing secondhand golf balls? Mr. Lahodik has been making a living wage selling used Pro V1s. That’s outrageous. If you’re really that cheap, just check the rough after one of my rounds and you’ll have enough golf balls to last you a lifetime.

Anyways, shouts to Scott for escaping death and cheers to a speedy recovery. Maybe it’s time to search for a new career, though. Next time he may not be so lucky..

[via CBS Sports]

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