Green Beret Sniper Unleashes Hell On Michael Moore In Open Letter

Harrison Lee11 years ago

There’s not much to be said about Hollywood director Michael Moore’s tweet concerning snipers except that it was tasteless and unnecessary. One of the best responses that I saw was a military member saying that Moore’s uncle was rolling over in his grave. Every member of our military risks his or her life by stepping foot on enemy soil, and they all sacrifice their lives back home to keep threats away from us.

Bryan Sikes, a Green Beret, Purple Heart recipient, and sniper for our forces, penned a letter to Mr. Moore, in which he dished out his thoughts to the man who called him a coward. He did not hold back.

Mr. Moore-

Good afternoon there sweetheart, I hope this finds you alive and well. You can thank our men and women of the armed forces for that, by the way, and that also includes us cowardly snipers. It seems you’ve found time between licking the jelly off your fingers and releasing your grasp of a bear claw to tweet some junk about snipers being cowards.

Sikes wastes no time in calling Moore a cream puff and poking fun at his weight, knowing full well that if Moore was put through the Green Beret’s physical test, he’d flunk in the first five seconds (five is generous, I know). It only gets better from there, as he pours on hot and heavy insults.

Michael, I highly would not recommend entering a room with Sikes unless you’re a fan of ridicule.

If you and I were in the same room, I’d throw you a smile and gently pat you on the head knowing you’re nothing more than a mouth breathing, Crisco sweating waste of space not even worthy of being in the presence of a sniper.

The limit of fat jokes that can be made toward Moore does not exist. This could have been a letter entirely made up of fat jokes, and it would still be gold. However, Sikes knows he is far superior to a guy who sits on his ass all day eating boxes of donuts and fried chicken while he defends his right to do that.

Ultimately, Sikes leaves Moore with a question to ponder, but not before he roasts him one more time.

So tenderfoot, I leave you with this final thought: what if you found yourself in some sort of hostage situation where you were held at knife-point by some crazed person and they were dead set on making an example of you by bleeding you out on Hollywood Blvd in front of the world, and the only way out was with the precision aimed fire of a sniper? Would you want that coward to take the shot? Because knowing how you feel about snipers such as myself and your hatred of firearms, I’d probably drop the mag, roll the bolt and go get a Jack & Coke before helping you out.

Very Respectfully,
Sikes

I’d do the exact same thing if I were in Sikes’s position. Moore will likely respond by spending the day at an all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet, stuffing his face with egg rolls and sweet and sour sauce. You can read the whole letter HERE, and I suggest you do, because it’s full of good shit. I can’t say it enough, but thank you to Bryan Sikes and all of our service members. God bless you..

[via Clash Daily]

Image via YouTube