Here’s Jen Selter Practically Making Sex With A Workout Machine

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Look out, Dorno, it’s Mr. Steal-Yo-Instagram-Crush. Jen Selter, notorious internet ass queen, is up to her old tricks on Instagram. Jen doesn’t post as often as she used to, probably because her business manager she realized that a single picture of her ass is worth tens of thousands of dollars, but when she does post, she makes that shit count. Exhibit A(ss):

#MondayMotivation @squatspo

A video posted by Jen Selter (@jenselter) on

Got…DAMN. Some might say that Russia’s mounting tension in Eastern Europe may cause World War III, but for my money, it’s gonna be this caboose. Look at that thing. She knows exactly what she’s doing. The Smithsonian needs to curate a life-size, animatronic dummy of her and put it in the Natural Science museum at the end of the evolution exhibit, because this is what the top of the ass food chain looks like.

Mercy me.

  1. Tuco1855

    “Hey, can you video tape my ass while I work out so I can show people?” This girl is a joke.

    10 years ago at 10:07 am
      1. Tuco1855

        Should I drool over her instead? Will she fuck me then? She’s the epitome of a try hard. She sticks her ass out and walks around like she shit her pants and she has hundreds of the exact same workout video. What kind of person does that?

        10 years ago at 10:18 am
      2. WillardFratkins1855

        “Do you know how a model makes a living?”

        Are you fucking kidding me? Did you read that sentence out loud? So every desperate girl with an Instagram account, an ass, and a “booking e-mail” which she just made up is a “model” now?

        She’s not Gisele Bundchen or Brooklyn Decker, she isn’t modeling or advertising any actual product with any legitimate contract. Some rando at the gym filming her ass is not a photo shoot.

        I’m with Tuco, don’t even try to validate her bullshit. Just a hot girl with daddy issues crying out for attention. Nothing more.

        10 years ago at 11:22 am
      3. Dillon Cheverere

        She’s not a model? What are you talking about? She makes a living (a really good one) with her ridiculous body. She’s a fitness model.

        She 100% has contracts. Again, what are you talking about?

        Look at this post. You think she just likes Muscle Pharm protein bars so much that she’ll promote them for free? Are you an idiot?

        10 years ago at 11:49 am
      4. JerryJones

        Gonna have to side with Dorno on this one. She might be annoying, but she’s still making more $ every year than any of you chumps make.

        10 years ago at 11:57 am
      5. Dillon Cheverere

        Anyone with common sense or just a basic understanding of life will side with me on this one.

        10 years ago at 12:02 pm
      6. mosthonorableactive

        I know she followed you back on Twitter or whatever but she’s not gonna touch your penis Dorn

        10 years ago at 12:35 pm
      7. Dillon Cheverere

        She’s become a brand. Her body is her livelihood. She promotes it just as any company would promote their product.

        I don’t understand why you’re so bent out of shape about this.

        10 years ago at 12:47 pm
      8. Whiskey_Tango

        She’s 100% become a brand. A buddy of mine reached out to her over a year ago about developing an E-commerce website (see Jenselter.com) Besides the fact that her “manager” is a complete idiot with no basic business skills (one of her friends), she makes a killing on those Instagram posts and actually does some photo shoots.

        10 years ago at 1:24 pm
      9. TucoTFM

        We have a disagreement so you put me on house arrest? You’re a real jerk, Rodge, you know that? You made me buy a new MacBook just so I could e-frat from a new IP address. You owe me $1800. Merry fucking Christmas, dick.

        10 years ago at 1:25 pm
      10. Ihavefirmnipples

        She’s a model, she isn’t a model, she has daddy issues, she’s an attention whore, why does any of this matter. Her heiney makes me salivate like Pavlov’s dogs, and that’s all that matters in my book. Thank you for the post ChampionsTour.

        10 years ago at 3:06 pm
      11. Raylan_Givens

        If I take a picture in bed with a TFM shirt next to me while showing off my dad body and post it on Instagram, will I get a contract?

        10 years ago at 6:16 pm
    1. ILoveFratking

      Is it worth the fat, sweaty oldies laying on you for hours for 30 seconds of this Goddess? I think not.

      10 years ago at 7:51 pm
    1. SlutsWillbeSluts

      Agreed, typical Instagram female douche bag. I would still of course want hate fuck her.

      10 years ago at 10:48 am
      1. BeerOlympics

        Surprised this got so many down votes. Even if she is a bitch, who wouldn’t want the image of this girls ass at point blank range permanently ingrained in memory. Guess I’m the only one. But I’m okay with that.

        Laps being taken.

        10 years ago at 1:50 pm
      2. LIPowerDrive

        Because you’d have SlutsWillbeSluts dick and balls in your face too…dipshit

        10 years ago at 8:55 pm
  2. DionysusFratGod

    Is it just me or is she not all that attractive anymore, I guess I’ve matured from chasing Bottle rats …

    10 years ago at 10:17 am
  3. I teabag Mrs Obama

    She’s such a fucking tool. Having said that, I’d still stick my throbbin wobbly in her cobbler gobbler.

    10 years ago at 10:19 am
  4. inhocFaF

    I mean, yea, she’s hot. However, this video doesn’t do shit for me. What’s the deal with those pants, they aren’t your run of the mill yoga pants. It’s like they’re shiny and I can’t stop admiring them.

    10 years ago at 10:26 am