I Still Can’t Believe Joe Jonas’ Abortion Of An NBA All-Star Weekend Concert
I know, I know — I’m kind of late reporting on Joe Jonas’ ungodly, inhumanely earsplitting NBA All-Star Weekend musical performance. That’s because I didn’t have time to write it up when I saw it and I expected the almost unbelievable video to immediately blow up, meaning I would’ve been late to the party if I’d covered it any later. I noticed today, however, that the masses were apparently never informed of the middle Jo Bro’s theatrics on Saturday night, and I’m now taking it upon myself to show you the most incredibly bizarre Jonas Brothers moment since the government detained all three of them in 2006 to interrogate them about their experiences time-traveling to the year 3,000.
How is this man an AMA-winning, Grammy-nominated recorded artist? This isn’t singing — it’s karaoke. And I’m not talking good karaoke, like cruise ship karaoke; this is liquid courage karaoke at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, where the participants are physiologically dependent on alcohol for courage and thus drink to the point of incontinence in order to convince themselves to go on stage (except Jonas is shitting out his mouth, not out his ass… though I would describe his whole performance as one large mouth shart).
“Cake By The Ocean” has made me want to take a leisurely stroll straight into the ocean and keep going until the bubbles stop..
[via Twitter/@Deadspin]
Image via Twitter/@Deadspin
Where’s his purity ring?
9 years ago at 10:41 amIn his girlfriend.
9 years ago at 12:43 pmThat scene of Mickey Mouse beating the shit out of the Jonas brothers still makes me lose my shit every time
9 years ago at 2:53 pmJoe jonas NF
9 years ago at 10:51 amDo not ever ever admit to having listened to The Year 3000.
9 years ago at 11:37 amReminds me of myself after I polish off a bottle of scotch and before I make love to the most emotionally unstable brunette in the bar.
9 years ago at 12:52 pmThe best of days
9 years ago at 4:34 pmNBA All-Star Weekend is an abortion on its own. Dunk contest sucks, the actual game is ass, the only slightly redeeming quality is the 3 point shootout.
9 years ago at 2:27 pmThe USA/World rising stars game was kinda fun; at least some of those guys played semi-hard
9 years ago at 4:06 pmYou’re right. It was redeeming. However, the actual ASG is boring as hell to me.
9 years ago at 4:22 pmDunk contest is hit-or-miss, this year was a big miss
9 years ago at 6:36 pmBasketball (along with soccer) are minority sports. Football, baseball, and hockey are much better sports.
9 years ago at 4:17 pmtry less
9 years ago at 5:43 pmSo many NFLers coming out of prep schools and country clubs good point fuck stick
9 years ago at 8:27 amFun fact he actually has played 3/3 of the last NBA league office major events. See also league office Christmas party and somethings over the summer. Highest standards.
9 years ago at 10:21 pm